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    • Finding My FLAUNT!

      
An excerpt from FLAUNT! Drop Your Cover and Reveal Your Smart, Sexy & Spiritual Self 
by Lora Cheadle

      Using the principles of burlesque, author Lora Cheadle’s FLAUNT! helps women strip away everything nonessential that’s covering their raw, beautiful souls in order to reveal the sparkling goddess lurking inside. All too often, women have been taught to hide their true selves with costumes, characters, and masks, creating a persona to show the world that pleases others and acts as the “good girl,” doing what is expected. These layers may originally seem imperative, but all too often they begin to chafe and restrict, suppressing the true beautiful and unique spirit that every women has.

      We hope you enjoy this excerpt from the book.


      Let me share with you the labels, roles, and scripts of my past. The accompanying costumes, accessories, and dance steps that were all a part of the choreography created for me by others. Why? Because oftentimes we see aspects of ourselves in the stories of others, bringing us levels of insight that we didn’t have before. What I want for you is to be able to recognize and release the choreography that no longer serves you so you can dance your dance, your own way. To see how my past informed my present, how it almost dictated my future, and how I used FLAUNT! to set myself free from constantly seeking external validation and find joy and satisfaction beyond what I thought possible.

      What I wanted, deep in my soul, was to be wickedly smart, without being labeled an aggressive bitch. To be powerfully spiritual, using and developing my own intuition on my own terms, without being called a New Age, woo-woo freak. To be sexy as hell, my own way, and enjoy how my body looked and felt, without being called a slut. I wanted to flaunt and to be all that I was without apology and most certainly without cover. Without checking pieces of me at the door when I went into a professional environment, and without altering or limiting myself to suit others. I wanted to flaunt myself, not to be obnoxious but to allow myself the opportunity to live the full breadth of all that I was. Part Amazon warrior, part gangly pink flamingo, part regal countess, part traditional June Cleaver, part ethereal goddess. I wanted to set all of me free, to show myself and the world everything I was capable of. Without worrying what people might think.

      Finding My FLAUNT!
      With an explosion of color, FLAUNT! woke me up to the fact that I had spent my life dancing choreography that was not my own. I had let others choose the music, the costumes, and even the stage on which I was supposed to perform. I had willingly cloaked myself with costumes, labels, roles, and scripts that were not mine. In my quest for “perfect womanhood” I had inadvertently hidden my true self and dulled my own sparkle. FLAUNT! made me realize that in order to be happy and healthy and to joyfully dance my own life, I didn’t need to do more or try harder.

      What I needed was to strip out of all that I had layered on in an attempt to be what I was “supposed to be” and expose myself exactly as I was. FLAUNT! showed me that I was a smart, capable, and dedicated mom, wife, and career woman, who also happened to be smart, sexy, and spiritual. And that was okay! Revealing my truth, my core essence, the divine goddess I was inside, and bringing in all versions of everything I had ever been, empowered me to re-choreograph a new life that was more spectacular, more satisfying, and more fully my own than I had ever dreamed possible.

      Through the five steps of FLAUNT! — Find Your Fetish, Laugh Out Loud, Accept Unconditionally, Navigate the Negative, and Trust Your Truth — and using burlesque as the vehicle, you can recognize and release the inhibitions and judgments that are covering you; reveal all facets of your authentic, core self (ahem, your inner burlesque star); and re-choreograph a brilliant, connected, and deeply satisfying life that reveals your beauty, brains, and beliefs so you can find the authentic joy, fulfillment, and self-acceptance that you crave. Are you ready to find your Naked Self-Worth and to sparkle? Then let’s FLAUNT!
      The Costumes and Steps Required for the Dance of Perfect Womanhood
      Most of us have been wearing the costumes of the roles we play for so long that we’re not even aware that we are wearing them. We play a million different roles and have a million different responsibilities, and knowing our roles so well, we are adept at quick costume changes, of switching seamlessly between our various identities. Yet while we are often clear on how to live up to these roles, we are rarely clear on how to live up to being ourselves.

      Growing up, I asked myself what I wanted to do with my life, not who I wanted to be. I never asked myself, Who are you, Lora, deep inside, exclusive of your labels, roles, and scripts, and what kind of a woman would you like to be? or What do you need to do in order to create and sustain internal satisfaction, despite external circumstances? No, I was more focused on answering questions like, Where should I go to college? What should I major in to ensure that I get a job? and What are the next steps to take in order to achieve my career goals? Nor did I ever sit down and plan out how I was going to do what I aspired to do while still being who I authentically was. You may have been the same way, more focused on doing than being. And it’s my hunch that you never asked yourself deep, provocative questions about who you were inside and how you were going to integrate your honest expression of self with all that you wanted to do, either.

      In my case, I modeled the behavior of those I loved, adopted the actions of those I admired, emulated beliefs of those I respected, and fumbled my way into adulthood, for right or for wrong. I’m guessing that I’m not alone, and like mine, many of your identities were created inadvertently over time, with little or no conscious awareness on your part of how they showcased or masked the woman you were inside.


      Lora Cheadle is the author of FLAUNT! After ten years of practicing corporate law in California and Colorado, she chose to change paths to become the radio host and Life Choreographer® she is today. She is a certified hypnotist, personal trainer, burlesque performer, and yoga instructor, as well as a popular writer for People magazine and Elephant Journal. She offers “Find Your Sparkle” coaching programs, workshops, and destination retreats and teaches all over the world. Her home base is in Colorado. Find out more about her work at LoraCheadle.com.

      Excerpted from the book FLAUNT!. Copyright ©2019 by Lora Cheadle. Printed with permission from New World Library.

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    • Double Vision: Grandson Is Afraid In Her House
      depressed

      My house is built on ground that has a rich history. The house itself is almost 60 years old. When my young grandson comes to visit, he generally doesn’t want me out of his sight. He says he is sometimes scared in the house, and he won’t go in the back bedroom where his toys are unless someone is with him. Sometimes in the early morning hours, his battery-operated toys will turn on by themselves. We connect very strongly with each other, and when he looks into my eyes, it feels like he knows me better than I know myself. Can you tell me something about why he’s afraid in my house, and if he is naturally psychic? Thank you so much!

       – Monique

      Astrea:

      The house where I live will be 100 years old next March. Old houses are filled with the kind of energy you describe.

      This house was the barn for the house next door, and then my great aunt’s house and then Granny’s and now mine. If I’ve been gone for a day, the spirits rush around me when I come home. So many spirits are here all the time that sometimes the energy grows strong and confusing, even for me.

      Even though I have similar activity in my entire house, it is like that one room in yours. The stairs are where most of that energy gathers here. My son would never go upstairs alone in this house when he was a small fry. He’s 33 now, and he still doesn’t like to do it!

      My granddaughter is more like me: She heads for those stairs as soon as she gets through the door. We hear people on the landing of the stairs, and she will often stop there and sit on that step for a little while before running all the way up to the room that was my Big Daddy’s.

      She talks to him as if he’s right there with her, and who’s to say he’s not? She’s only four, so she has yet to develop the belief that when someone dies, we can’t talk to them anymore.

      Sometimes she can give me messages from him that I can’t get on my own. I get a nice, warm feeling when that happens. I’m delighted that instead of being afraid like my son, she is drawn to spirits.

      Your grandson is experiencing the same kind of connection. For a three-year-old, the energy in that room is naturally frightening, but you can help him accept that he’s special and sensitive in good ways.

      Living in an old house brings this out in all of us to various degrees. He’s afraid because your home is the first place this has happened to him. He’s just being careful because this is new. There will be other places as he gets older.

      Like my grandchild, he’s a born medium. Is his gift being nurtured by you or his parents? Will his folks have a fit if they find out that he can speak with the dead, or would that be something your family could appreciate?

      Whether it’s acceptable in your family or not, you should all try to get used to it happening with this little boy. When he’s old enough to decide, he can choose to use or block his ability, but that is going to be his decision alone.

      Until then, try not to make a big deal about that room and what he feels in it. If you act natural and normal but also emphasize the good side of his sensitivity, soon his fear will dissipate and he’ll have fun tuning in to whoever or whatever is there.

      *****

      Susyn:

      Your grandson sounds very intuitive and sensitive. It’s important to acknowledge his fears and respond to them. It’s a shame our generation was encouraged to ignore, squelch or question our extra sensory perceptions when we were young. Thank goodness we’re all becoming more open to these experiences now.

      I can see that you are honoring and affirming your grandson’s feelings. I sense a deep bond of love and trust between the two of you. He’s definitely an old soul, and he has much to teach you about honoring your own intuitions.

      There is definitely an entity living in the room where his toys are kept. This is most likely a child-like spirit who may have lived in the house before you; a little research could confirm that.

      What’s important, however, is that your grandson is picking up that this spirit is not good at sharing or playing well with others. Otherwise, he would have already become your grandson’s new imaginary friend.

      The first thing you should do is move the toys to another room or area of the house and leave them there for a week to see if they continue to turn on by themselves. While the toys are out of the room your grandson avoids, you can cleanse the area with this simple ritual:

      Take four raw eggs and carefully place one in each corner of the room. You can place a bowl or plate under them in case they break. Leave the eggs in the room for seven days, checking on them once each morning and once each evening to make sure they haven’t cracked or broken.

      If you discover one has cracked, flush it down the toilet and replace it with a new egg. After seven days, break all the eggs into the toilet and simply flush the negative energy away.

      A week after performing this ritual, if you’ve seen no signs of activity from this spirit, see if your grandson is more open to returning to the playroom. On the other hand, if the toys continue to turn on or your grandson is still avoiding the room, you’ll want to smudge the entire house with sage or sage incense.

      Light the sage and walk from room to room, asking the spirit to leave the premises and move into the light. Add that he doesn’t live there anymore, and needs to join his family on the spirit plane. As you wave the sage stick, be sure to smudge windows, doorways and any electronics in the room like TVs, computers and phones.

      This should take care of the problem. From what you describe, it doesn’t sound like a poltergeist or negative entity – just a spirit who doesn’t realize he doesn’t live there anymore.

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