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7 Ways to Traverse Your Way Through Any Transition, by Servet Hasan

(Article originally published in The Llewellyn Journal.)

None of us can escape loss. Life's challenges are universal and eventually will find us. Whether you're moving to a new city, leaving for college, or experiencing a divorce in your family, having life throw a major curve ball can leave us longing for the way things used to be. Yes, there is often grief and pain associated with these transitions, especially the surprise attackers, such as losing a job, or discovering we have a serious illness. It doesn't matter whether a life transition evolves slowly over time or is forced by an unexpected event; we have to plunge ourselves into purgatory. Life transitions can be periods of enormous personal and psychological growth. Instead of falling into fear or avoidance, we can realize that every change we face—even the most difficult and painful—gives us an opportunity to receive the miraculous gift of self-realization. It is a golden opportunity to reinvent ourselves and find wholeness in our lives.

Just when you think you've fallen completely to pieces, your inner guidance system can and will help you understand that loss is only what you make of it. Rather than deny it, become a victim, or reach for whatever addiction you feel may cover up the agony, you can actually learn to embrace your pain. In so doing, you will realize that everything that happens to you, every situation in which you find yourself, represents a lesson that could teach you how to take the next step forward in the actualization of your selfhood. Growing up is all about learning to leave some things behind in order to embrace the new. In fact, transition periods can become some of the most exciting, creative, and even liberating times of our lives. They can become catalysts for our personal evolution by forcing us to face every issue we have ever avoided facing, thereby uncovering the essential truth about who we really are. This is the true meaning of spiritual renewal.

If you are in the middle of a transition, take a deep breath and know that by supporting yourself during this time you are setting the stage for a brilliant new phase in your life. In my book, Life in Transition: An Intuitive Path to New Beginnings, I suggest many ways in which you can not only move past the fear and embrace the change, but come out on the other side better and stronger than ever. Below are seven suggestions for moving through any life challenge.

1. One Day at a Time. If you are feeling overwhelmed, it's time to change time zones. When you stop stewing over the past and fretting about the future you will suddenly find that your challenges are much more manageable. Focus on what you can do in the moment each day, here and now. When chaos is swirling around you, your normal routine will become a stabilizing force. Just getting up, getting dressed, and going to work can provide you with a sense of comfort. Naturally, there will be some routines that change with your transition, but try to hold on to as many as you can so you don't lose your footing entirely. Every change brings something new and beautiful into your life. Simply do the best that you can every day and take time to be kind to yourself. Go slow. Rest. Eat well. If you had the flu, you would make time to heal; it's no different in cases of the heart and soul.
2. Why...Not. I get it. I for one have an almost obsessive need to know why something happened, because I don't handle ambiguity well. But I've learned the hard way that the answer is not always what I think it is, and it sometimes takes months or years to discover why I went through what I went through. I have also come to realize that many of my perceived failings were simply that: perceived failings. And sometimes transitions just can't be analyzed and thought out. Someone telling you that everything happens for a reason usually doesn't help; even if it does, it doesn't help you move past it. Often, there is no logical explanation and it doesn't really matter why it happened. Let's face it: life is not fair. And if you really want to know what you did to deserve what happened to you, the only answer would be that you were born. You can't change the past; all you can do is learn from it and move on.
3. Be Optimistic. A shift in perspective can work miracles. I know it's easier said than done, but try to focus on the positive aspects of this life-changing situation. The healing process has a beginning, a middle, and an end. You will get better. You will survive. Saying affirmations by rote won't help, but if you can find one that resonates with you, stick with it. Some thoughts to help you through a troubled time may be, "This too shall pass," or, "I know things will get better," or, "When life gives me pits, I plant them and grow cherry trees." Anything that helps you look at the bright side and move through the crisis is beneficial. Remember that God's rejection is also God's protection.
4. Listen to Your Intuition. Your intellect is how you process your challenges, but your intuition is how you will experience them, and ultimately walk through them. Knowledge can help you understand the pain, but it's your inner voice that will guide you towards the wisdom you will gain from it. No matter how subtle the changes and shifts you are going through may seem, you must sit quietly and listen intently to your gut reactions. When you don't know what to do next, your internal guidance system will naturally lead you to the next step, whether or not it seems logical at the time. Let your heart guide you. It generally knows what's best for you long before your brain does.
5. Don't Force Yourself to Heal. Being in a transition of any kind is a process. You can't walk around it, or slide under or over it; you have to move through it. Some people will fight the process tooth and nail, so they can hurry up and get to the other side. You can try that. But eventually your psyche will fight back, usually by becoming angry or depressed, anxious or physically sick for much longer than necessary. Accept, and if possible embrace, the changes you are encountering. They are all part of the body's natural healing process. You may think you know what stage you are in within the transition, but then again, maybe you don't. The unsettled feelings that come with transition are uncomfortable, but you can't jump ship at the first sight of land. You want to plant yourself firmly on a solid foundation and not a sinking island. Allow yourself to mourn meaningfully. You might as well do it right the first time.
6. Take Time to Go Inward Every Day. Surrender to the fact that the Universe may have a better plan for you. Take time to allow yourself to make room for miracles to happen. It doesn't matter what your faith may be, but it is imperative that you seek the still, quiet voice within. Grieving your old life, even in minor transitions, is to be expected. You are simply letting go of all that was and all that might have been. This is normal and an important part of the healing process. If possible, write down your feelings and then write some more. Journaling is so cathartic during life transitions; it is good for your soul to release your churned-up emotions.
7. Find Support. If you start to feel as if you are no longer in control; have a history of emotional difficulty; or find that you are turning to drugs, alcohol, or other abusive substances, it's time to reach out and get help. There is no shame in asking someone to help you maneuver the bumps you will encounter. Asking for help is not a cop out, or a sign of weakness; in fact, it takes a great deal of courage to ask for assistance when you need it. Also, finding others that have gone through a similar loss can provide a great deal of support and guidance. Just remember that anyone can offer you advice, but only you know what is right for you.

Article originally published in The Llewellyn Journal. Copyright Llewellyn Worldwide, 2014. All rights reserved.

I have always believed that we choose our lives before we come to earth in order to learn what we need to learn. It's one of the ways I make sense of seemingly pointless acts of violence against people, and how I can understand why some people experience such hardship during their lifetimes. What I can't understand is why or how animals would choose to live on earth and be so cruelly treated at times. Do you believe that animals make the choice to incarnate as we do? What are your spiritual beliefs about the role of animals here on earth and in the afterlife? Thanks for your insights into this subject.

Mary

Dreamchaser:

As you may know, I am a huge believer in the wisdom and power of animals both on the physical plane and in spiritual realms. At times, I learn from animals more easily than I learn from other humans.

Each animal has a specific trait that we can learn and adopt by observing and studying the animal itself. We do not have to have an actual live animal in our presence to learn from that animal, however - we can also read about the animal in books or on the internet.

Animals are also here on earth to just be our companions. To learn about loyalty and unconditional love, for example, someone could adopt a stray dog. Befriending a dog is probably the best way on earth to learn about those particular traits.

To learn about planning and providing for the future, one can watch a squirrel. Observe, for example, how the squirrel puts his stash in all kinds of different places - he does not just put it in one place. My Daddy always told me that the way to wealth was through diversification of income, which is something the squirrel seems to understand instinctively.

Animals also provide us with food and clothing at times. I think this is where most of your question comes into play. I too have often wondered why some animals are born just to be killed in order to provide for our needs.

Every soul has a unique path and lessons that need learning. Each soul will pick its own best way to learn a particular lesson, then it will plan an incarnation by finding a family, location, time, etc., that will best suit its needs.

Animals usually have very short life spans compared to humans. It seems to me that by incarnating as an animal, one might be able to very quickly learn some lessons or repay some karma. (I personally think that every animal chosen as a pet by a kid is here for a big lesson, as they will be sorely neglected.)

I believe there are times that certain animals choose to be with certain people. I am sure that my little black cat chose my son. He happened to see her being born through a window, and they have been fast friends ever since. I am sure her soul chose to come into that little black cat body.

I also feel humans and animals often both learn from each other, so they can have mutually beneficial relationships. Other times I think animals will come to us in service, or purely as teachers.

When I channel people who have passed over, I often see them with a favorite pet. The pet is still in the same form it had when it was last alive in the physical, at least as I am shown it.

So I do believe that animal souls choose to come here just like human souls do, according to a divine, natural order.

I wish you many amazing animal encounters.

*****

Astrea:

I don't believe animals share our level of conscious awareness, even though some seem to THINK they do. Ink, my black witch's cat, maintains that she not only knew where she would live and the people she would be with, but she planned all of this with me before either of us incarnated. We have an extraordinary bond; it does feel like we've been together many times.

Mars, my huge orange Tabby, thinks this is a wild, goofball idea that only humans could think up. "What would I have to learn?" he asked. "I know EVERYTHING! I know there is a rat I'm going to get one of these days when it cools off upstairs. I know what time breakfast is served. I can find the litter box when I feel like using it instead of the wall or your shoes. I was able to survive being abandoned, and wound up here in my own private palace. Why would I need more than the nine lives I have right here?"

When I asked Cody, my friend's horse, he said, "What you have me? Apple? Carrot? Nothing? Go 'way then." Since Cody wasn't interested in talking about your question, I'm thinking he is a one-timer. The other horses weren't interested in talking about it, either. (I find horses aren't big talkers - at least, not to me.)

As for dogs, I don't have one at the moment, and the two next door were busy when I asked them. Daisy, (a Labrador retriever) had a brand new set of wicker furniture to tear up and eat. "Incarnations? Aren't those the flowers I ate last week? Oh, those were Crosanthimumums! I'm too busy to talk to you now, come back after I eat that chair."

Madison, aka Mad Dog, was too busy barking at me to listen intelligently to ANY question. Madison is alone a lot, so when she gets any attention at all, she's usually too excited for deep conversation.

My friend Sue's dog, Max, was an exceptional individual. He promised her he would return in another body so that they could complete this life journey together. That was almost eight years ago, and he hasn't reappeared yet. Either he's happy in Heaven and waiting for her there, or he's as picky as he was in life, and can't find a puppy about to be born that he feels is "good enough" for his spirit.

My big Great Dane wasn't much for talk, but he was deeply emotional. I look for him in the eyes of every puppy I meet. Nothing yet. But I know from him that just like every human is unique, so is every animal.

Comet, the Inscrutable and Mighty Gray One, says that dogs incarnate one time to love us, so we have to enjoy them while they are here. Once we cross over, we're reunited with all our loved ones, including pets. They wait for us, and there is such great joy when we see each other again that all sadness is driven from us forever.

Astrea:

Many times in life we hear, "You will always have what you NEED, but not necessarily what you WANT." Your spirit must have needed to experience the feeling of leaving your human body, and the suggestion in the next chapter of Sylvia Brown's book was all it took to get you there.

Even though you hadn't read it yet, your SOUL recognized the title of that chapter as something it had been seeking, and your soul, knowing that you had that reference to read after your experience, got with it and out you went!

While I don't usually recommend her books, Sylvia Brown has a wide reaching and powerful effect on lots of people. A Gemini like you would be able to relate easily to her writing and put it to good use. Synchronicity - you gotta love it!

I like your description of "getting caught." That's exactly what it feels like, isn't it? One minute you're free and hovering above the room, and the next minute, ZAP! back down into your corporeal form you go!

As a little kid, I loved that "feeling of return." With practice, most of the time we can control that event, but sometimes, when our physical ears hear a distracting noise or something else occurs to knock us back into reality, back we go. With practice you will be able to control your return better.

I find it interesting that you were visiting your mother-in-law and not someone in your own genetic family. Evidently, you and your husband got married for reasons that are even deeper than love. His family's interest in "psychic stuff" will nurture your children in such matters and help them to grow into their own abilities.

You'll never have to be concerned that when your daughter visits them, she'll be discouraged from exploring her own psychic life and power. My parents encouraged me to develop my psychic senses in a time when it wasn't nice to even discuss such things in public. Heck, it's STILL not considered a great topic at the dinner table in some families!

Your kids will get to talk about it ALL and ask questions and read and study. This is going to give them such an edge in life! Talk with your husband about how you want to present this to your kiddos, so that you are united in your approach and ready to tell them their experiences are all natural and okay.

A word or two of warning: Geminis often have difficulty staying grounded in REAL LIFE. Don't get so strung out on your ASTRAL life that you neglect what you're doing here on Earth.

You are at the beginning of a long journey to learn where your power really lies. Try to be patient with this process and take your time.