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An excerpt from The Clutter Remedy: A Guide to Getting Organized for Those Who Love Their Stuff,

by Marla Stone

Decluttering effectively requires self-honesty, since the goal is to remove from your home whatever is inauthentic, out of date, and burying or blocking your authentic self and aspirations. As you do, little and big gems of understanding will fall into your lap, astounding and dazzling you. Clearing up hazy half-truths and stupefying, self-defeating behaviors clears the path to becoming a champion and builder of your empire.

Ironically, one of the things people discover is how they could have fooled or misled themselves about their own lives, often with good intentions, yet in very unsettling ways. Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy are innocent, well-meaning untruths, but as a child
I remember feeling a little squeamish when I realized I had been duped. Since then, it’s made me wonder: Do these early fictions teach us that it’s okay and sometimes preferred to lie and dupe ourselves? To tell “little white lies” or say yes when we want to say no? To pick a career that does not interest us because parents or society convince us that it is the only way to succeed? Or to choose a particular path because we think it will be the only thing we will be good at? Are we supposed to deny what we enjoy because others will judge us or we believe it’s wrong? When people are confused about what they want in life, the Clutter Remedy is an excellent process for recognizing personal truth.

For this reason, I always advise people to approach decluttering from the stance of “no judgment.” See clearly, be honest, and avoid blame. Foster unconditional love and regard for yourself. Be kind, no matter what you discover. By going through this process, you’ve committed to remedying the accumulated clutter in your space, and this usually requires seeing and addressing your inner clutter: the issues, emotions, pain, and untruths that led to it. No one, including yourself, is allowed to judge you, criticize you, or complain about how much you own, how you collected it, or what you will keep. No one should be eyeing your stuff for themselves. It’s your stuff and nobody else ’s business. Accepting your clutter as you find it, without feeling shame or regret, is the optimal stance. This will help you see more clearly and will help you recognize any negative patterns and attitudes that you will want to work through prior to going through all your stuff. Focusing on blame and getting mired in judgment will only stress you out and bog you down.

One thing that helps make the experience fun and uplifting is to remember that everything you own was chosen for a reason. You acquired things with good intentions; they were useful or they served a purpose or you simply loved them. So when you look at your possessions objectively, ask yourself, “Why is this in my real estate? Why did I think this was a good idea?” You could have chosen certain items because they reminded you of good times. Or they were expensive items that conveyed a certain status you desired. We buy and keep items for lots of reasons. Some items you find during decluttering will remain useful and serve a purpose and still be loved, while some will make no sense at all. Remaining nonjudgmental and enthusiastic rather than ashamed
and befuddled over your stuff is easier when you see how it relates to your core values. Remember, the goal of decluttering is to create an organized, satisfying, and productive lifestyle.

Marla Stone, MSW, is the owner of I-Deal-Lifestyle Inc., which provides decluttering, design, corporate training, and lifestyle coaching services. She is a former social worker and psychotherapist turned professional organizer who helps people live an ideal lifestyle by getting to the root of their mental, emotional, spiritual, and environmental challenges. She lives in Orange County, California. More information at www.i-deal-lifestyle.com

Excerpted from the book The Clutter Remedy. Copyright © 2019 by Marla Stone. Printed with permission from New World Library.

Some time ago I had a reading with a shaman, and I purchased a talisman from him designed to bring me prosperity. Do you believe in things like lucky charms, amulets and talismans? If so, do they need to be recharged after a while? If they do, is this something I can do myself? How would I go about that? Thanks in advance for your enlightenment!

- Pamela

Dreamchaser:

I'm not sure what you bought from this shaman, so I can't tell you if I believe in it or not. Did you find yourself becoming more prosperous after you got it?

I don't believe in typical lucky charms, because I don't believe in luck in the first place - but that is another column. I do, however, absolutely believe in the power of stones and crystals. I believe that if I charge a crystal, stone, talisman, or anything else with a specific energy and intention, then that is what that object will put out.

I also believe in amulets for protection, love, prosperity, etc. I have stones on my desk that I've collected from all over. Some are rocks that I found in special places. Some are crystals or stones that I bought at a shop or fair. Each one has meaning to me, and each one serves a purpose in my life.

One of my favorites is a round copper ball. It is approximately one inch around, and it always sits on my desk. I pick it up almost every time I am sitting at my desk. I roll it around between my palms and I feel its energy. It infuses me with energy - it's almost like a power surge. It also balances me. I love how it feels, and I love how it works.

Everyone needs to find his or her own favorite item. If something fills you with positive energy, then it is a good thing. It doesn't matter if it is a rabbit's foot, copper penny or precious stone: whatever works for you, works for you.

You can recharge such items whenever you feel they need to be recharged. I usually put my stones in a glass of water and put them on a windowsill in the moonlight. I leave them there for 24 hours. If I need to do a quick charge, I might do some Reiki on the item.

Be sure to put your intention into the water along with the stone or talisman. Water is a natural cleanser for stones. If your object is something that can't get wet, then you can simply lay it in the moonlight and ask that it be cleared and charged.

Please remember that the Universe hears your intention more than the ritual, so if you don't follow a prescribed ritual exactly, it doesn't matter - the Universe knows your true aim.

If your intention is to clear the stones and recharge them, then that is what will happen. Putting them in water is more symbolic than anything. It does help to cleanse them, but it's not necessary. If your intention is prosperity, just state that when you lay the object down to charge. (Often, we make things more complicated than they have to be!)

I wish you endless abundance on all levels.

*****

Astrea:

I am the world's most superstitious person when it comes to charms, talismans and the other goofy stuff we carry with us for protection and other manifesting purposes. Just this past weekend, I emptied my bedroom of so many lucky beads, rocks, amulets, strings, feathers, coins and jewelry that I filled a whole big trunk with the stuff!

If I'm not wearing a charm, I'm busy making one for someone else to wear. If I can't find anyone selling those little anklets made from string, I make them myself. (The idea with these is you make a wish, and when the string breaks, the wish comes true.)

If I make an amulet and wear it once and something bad happens, I put it away and never wear it again. I have the most beautiful dark pearl necklace. It's very witchy, but I can't wear it because I was rear-ended the first time I wore it. Even though I've cleansed it in a dish of saltwater outside under a full moon, I'll never be able to trust it again, or give it away to a friend.

I believe the only thing that will make it okay again is to take it apart, cleanse all the elements, throw the clasp away (because what binds also controls) and start over. I won't remake it in the same design just in case that's what caused the bad luck.

Despite all of this, I don't really believe that lucky charms CAUSE things to happen. I think that we all make choices and we live with the consequences of those choices. However, things like charms and rituals can help us to consciously align with what we want in our lives.

For example, when I leave for the day, I place an invisible net of blue stars over my home and my car. This ritual represents my desire for protection and well-being. When I'm carrying or wearing something for good luck, it means I'm consciously choosing to align a positive experience.

I don't recommend buying charms off the rack from other people, with the exception of buying a charm or talisman FOR someone else if you feel it's appropriate. Buying and selling should be reserved to jewelry only. If you make charms for sale, for every one you sell, be sure to give away three.

I sold a wonderful coral piece right off my neck in Whole Foods to one of the deli servers because I felt she needed it more than I did. That was four years ago, and I STILL miss it. It was a powerful piece that drew excellent energy to the wearer, and I now think I should have kept it for myself!

Talismans may seem silly, but if they make you feel good and they reinforce what you want in your life, then they will work a certain magic for you.