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An excerpt from FLAUNT! Drop Your Cover and Reveal Your Smart, Sexy & Spiritual Self 
by Lora Cheadle

It’s odd to say, but my own spiritual self-growth journey mirrored the concepts found in burlesque: tease, voyeurism, and slow reveal. As a constant seeker of truth, I’d reach a new level of understanding, only to realize there was yet another layer to unveil. Which flummoxed me completely at times! I’d watch others, do what they did, meditate, read, and take classes. I’d study the great masters from around the world, do exactly what they did, but then I’d have a bad-hair day on the same day as a catastrophic hard-drive failure while uploading pictures of my son for his middle-school-graduation slide show (at the eleventh hour), and I’d come totally unhinged. It was almost like peace was a thing that the Universe would dangle in front of me, tease me mercilessly with, but never quite let me have. Just read one more book, Lora! If you would have only meditated this morning, you would have been fine, Lora! But how sad for you; you didn’t quite make it! Better luck next time!

How ironic that actual burlesque facilitated my process of self-discovery on a spiritual level. Just like burlesque performers let go of their clothing, I let go of my own limiting judgments and beliefs. I shed society’s labels, my own limited interpretation of myself and my roles, slowly at first and then with increasing fervor and joy. Stripped bare, the truth of my heart and soul visible for all to see, my own sparkle was exposed. I no longer had to guess who I was or what I wanted. I knew. And with that knowledge, I could re-choreograph my life as it was meant to be. Sparkly, brilliant, and more magnificently fun than I had ever dreamed!

And just like in burlesque shows, where the audience cheers wildly with the removal of each article of clothing, encouraging the performer to reveal more, so too did my friends and family cheer me wildly on as I removed layer upon layer of limiting judgments and beliefs. Through my journey I had unknowingly given others permission to begin their own burlesque, to reveal themselves, and to finally, gratefully, have the opportunity to be seen and accepted for who they were.

My foray into the world of burlesque showed me that burlesque is a joyful experience for the performers and audience alike because it busts stereotypes and celebrates women of all shapes, sizes, abilities, and ages. Burlesque is not about looking a certain way; it is about reveling in one’s reality. While other middle-aged moms flocked to me, larger women flocked to the larger burlesque performers, and flat-chested women crushed on the flat-chested performers. Seeing performers who looked like them, with what they perceived to be their same flaws, but who dared to be confident, beautiful, sexy, or funny in spite of those flaws, set them free to embrace those same qualities in themselves.

The act of watching someone just like them shed the label of fat, flat-chested, old, or ugly and be seen in all their glittery, flawed gloriousness was enough for some women to loosen their own labels. Watching their favorite performer do all they wished they could do, seeing others react encouragingly to their visibility, empowered many women to believe that they could let go and show their true selves as well. With its focus on humor and female-dominated power, burlesque gives women explicit permission to live confidently, joyfully, and without cover.

Is it any wonder that throughout my metamorphosis into an actual burlesque dancer I had so many friends watching my every move? Every layer of fear or expectation that I broke through — every label, role, or script that I challenged, reinterpreted, or removed — gave them permission to do the same. If I could be outrageously happy in spite of my imperfections, so could they. As I broke what I perceived to be “the rules,” I proved to myself that there was nothing stopping me from building my dreams and living my sparkle, except me.

The laughter, parody, and joy in the face of taboo and judgment that burlesque provided were the ideal combination to heal wounds around body image, sexuality, self-judgment, gender roles, power, shame, or guilt. Without setting foot on an actual stage, many of my friends were able to strip out of the fear, lies, and inhibitions that had been placed on them by their culture, family, or religion — or that were self-imposed. Just as my childhood belief that I needed to be perfect in order to be worthy became my metaphoric corset of perfection, so too could others find ways to release their own inhibitions.

Not only had I disrobed physically but I was disrobing emotionally, too, by living my particular brand of sparkle. Society said that a middle-aged mom, lawyer, and spirit-based female-empowerment coach shouldn’t do what I was doing. But I did it anyway. Not to rebel or to create a fuss, but because it was in my heart to do it. I was no longer worried about looking like I was doing the right things for the right reasons or being what I thought others wanted me to be. I was interested in getting metaphorically naked and revealing everything there was about myself.

And as a result, I was happier and more content than I had ever been. Accepting myself and my desires as they were freed me to dance my own dance with wild abandon, and that was exactly what I did!

Lora Cheadle is the author of FLAUNT! After ten years of practicing corporate law in California and Colorado, she chose to change paths to become the radio host and Life Choreographer® she is today. She is a certified hypnotist, personal trainer, burlesque performer, and yoga instructor, as well as a popular writer for People magazine and Elephant Journal. She offers “Find Your Sparkle” coaching programs, workshops, and destination retreats and teaches all over the world. Her home base is in Colorado. Find out more about her work at LoraCheadle.com.

Excerpted from the book FLAUNT!. Copyright ©2019 by Lora Cheadle. Printed with permission from New World Library.

I've had a number of psychic readings over the past couple of years, and I've started to notice a trend: Whenever I'm getting a reading, I will get a very bad headache, but it will disappear right after the session ends. It's made me realize that I often get mild headaches that come and go suddenly, and they are often accompanied by a vague sense that someone somewhere is thinking about me. Is this normal? What do you think is happening?

- Emily

Dreamchaser:

Our bodies get used to a certain vibrational level. For example, if we live by the beach, we get used to living at sea level. If we were to travel to a high altitude, we would absolutely feel the effects of that altitude on our bodies. Of course, people who live at that high altitude feel just fine, for it is normal to them.

This same basic concept also applies to spiritual energy. If we are around someone new, our stomach sometimes gets butterflies or we get sweaty palms or have some other physical reaction to that new person's energy. In fact, our physical bodies are constantly reacting to non-physical stimuli. When you are getting a reading and you get a headache, your body is reacting to the spiritual energy surrounding you and the reader.

You see, when you are getting a reading, your vibration rises dramatically. I think that stands to reason. Your body is not used to those higher levels of spiritual energy, and your head aches as a result.

Have you ever seen one of those thermal scanner devices on television? When they come across a body or some other form of heat energy, the scanner will change colors and form the shape of the body or energy and show it on the screen. That thermal scanner is reacting to the energy around it.

That is a good image for you to hold onto when it comes to your headaches. Your body is just reacting to the new energies or vibrational levels of the reading experience. You WILL get used to it. Once your body adjusts to the new vibration, the headaches will stop.

When you get headaches when you are NOT getting a reading, the same basic process is occurring but on another level. You could have spiritual beings around you, or you could have an energy connection going on with another being. When we think of someone, our energy leaves our body and goes to that person. Their energy feels our energy and transmits a signal to the brain that makes them think of us. When they think of us, they send us energy and we think of them again in turn. As this energy travels back and forth, it creates something of a loop.

You don't know all this is happening beneath the surface of your awareness; you just know that so and so just popped into your head. The rest of you, however, is making adjustments to the energies around you at all times. So, if you are getting these headaches, you can bet it is a reaction to the energy of the person who is thinking about you.

I wish you smooth adjustments to energetic changes.

*****

Astrea:

I have migraines and I hate them! Mine are all hormones, all the time. Fortunately, they don't seem to be related my work doing readings. I know readers that get them with certain clients, and that must be a real drag.

Oddly, when I have a headache I seem a lot more psychic to myself than when I don't. I think that particular pain has something to do with our receptors, and when we have a headache, we might notice things we would normally miss. I've learned to use my headaches as tools in my work, but that doesn't mean they're any more fun.

Pain is a warning that the body gives us that something is wrong. A headache is very hard to ignore. Since your headaches happen when you're getting readings, I'm sure that the type of headache you get during readings is a specific kind. It's different from a sinus headache or a tension headache, and it stops when the reading stops.

Nothing is wrong with you, but if you're psychic on your own, that pain might be the Universe telling you to listen to yourself instead of what any reader can tell you. Sometimes a headache will come on during readings when we're supposed to manifest the choices that we want to make in life without another person's assistance. Even asking for reassurance could start the throb.

It's also possible, however, that you are trying to cloak yourself from the reader, either intentionally or by accident. When a person doesn't feel open to a reading, sometimes she will try hiding facts from the reader. While she might want an answer to the question she is asking the psychic, she doesn't want the psychic to know certain other things about her past actions or personality.

Sometimes we do this as a reaction to a specific reader, or we do it subconsciously because there are secrets we want to keep. The body manifests that repression of who we are as aches and pains. Your head hurts because your brain is hiding!

These seem to be the two basic reasons that people get headaches during psychic readings. The first is that you are psychic on your own, and so your subconscious is rejecting someone else reading for you. The second is that you're trying to prevent the psychic from reading too much.

Of course, if the psychic is a phony, your own subconscious, inner knowing may try to alert you to stop the reading. Until you start with a reader, there is no way to know which one of these things is occurring.

Try doing your own readings from now on, and see if that gives you some relief.