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By Kristi Hugstad

Do you ever feel like your days blur into one big to-do list you can’t keep track of? You have to meet school deadlines, go to club meetings, work, hang out with your friends, spend time with your family, organize your desk and room, exercise, read, and so on. Have you ever felt stressed-out because, no matter how much you try, you are always behind and overwhelmed? To avoid this, here is a simple solution: journaling.

If you’re busy and overwhelmed, why add one more thing to do? Because journaling makes you more organized and efficient and can even help relieve your stress.

Most journaling experts talk about two different types of journaling: journaling to achieve professional success and journaling therapy to improve your mental health. The former would be writing down what steps you need to take to be a restaurant owner, for example, and creating a rough outline and calendar of milestones to reach in order to achieve your goals. An example of the latter would be to write down a painful memory — say, of the day your parents announced they were divorcing — as a way of untangling complex, difficult feelings.

This form of self-examination has been around a long time, and it is a powerful practice. If you want inspiration, definitely check out the many journaling blogs online, some of which are geared specifically toward high school and college students. Journaling can help anyone, regardless of age, education, interests, or writing skill.

Let’s talk about how journaling can positively impact your mental health. Journaling connects you with your inner self and helps you develop good habits of self-reflection. When you journal, you are communicating only with yourself. Your journal is a safe place to be honest, to be your authentic self without worrying about being judged. This is what makes it different from posting on Instagram or talking to friends, when we often filter ourselves to avoid judgment or we present an idealized version of ourselves. Instead, journaling allows you to connect with and learn about yourself, to reflect on your strengths and weaknesses, and to consider how to improve yourself. By writing your thoughts, intentions, actions, behaviors, goals, and dreams, you get to know what makes you happy and what makes you sad. You learn who and what drain you emotionally and who and what make you happy and confident. Writing helps you examine and understand emotions when you aren’t actually feeling them, so you can see them clearly.

Writing down your feelings and engaging in self-reflection is a necessary habit for good mental health. When you journal about your anger, sadness, and disappointments, you openly express and release any intense feelings and thoughts. You offload negative thoughts instead of carrying them, making your mind more peaceful. Writing about and reflecting on your emotions helps you identify stressors and feel empowered.

Journaling can also improve your self-esteem and self-confidence. Studies have shown that writing about stressful events and life traumas helps with grieving and makes us feel better not only psychologically but physically as well.

Journaling can also help you achieve goals and dreams, both personally and professionally. Keep in mind, journaling is not just reflecting on the past. It is about planning for the future. Journal about long-term goals, such as studying abroad, moving to a different city, going to graduate school, and your career. Do you want to become a doctor, writer, scientist, dancer? Write about what that means for you — more than once — and reflect on the steps you need to take to get there. Just like writing a daily to-do list, this makes your goals tangible and concrete. The simple act of writing down tasks makes you feel more organized and motivated to achieve them.

As you journal, you may see where and when you waste time and how you can manage your time better. Several studies have reported that people who write down their goals are more productive.

In addition, when you journal, even though you are just writing for yourself, you will improve your writing skills. Journaling allows you to write in a safe, no-pressure environment. Further, if one of your goals is to be a published writer or blogger, journaling can serve as a stepping-stone to larger writing projects. Since writing and speaking are connected, writing helps strengthen your verbal communication skills. Putting your thoughts down on paper (or on a screen), organizing them, and strategizing what you will say, helps you talk more concisely and clearly.

These benefits aside, when you write in your journal, you physically reduce the impact of stressors on your body. A small number of studies have shown that journaling can improve our immune system and can serve as a stress-management tool. As we all know, stress is the root cause of many human diseases.

As you can see, writing regularly can help you grow and release the potential that lies within you. Journaling can make your life both easier and happier. As you build a habit of self-reflection through journaling, it improves all aspects of your life. Mapping your future puts you on track for success. When you list your goals and write down your plans, they will seep into your actions. When you write about your past, painful emotions will be given verbal expression and released, which leads to healing. It’s like talk therapy, but the person you are talking to is yourself. You bear witness to yourself and thereby learn more about yourself and about your relationship to society and the world. It is in self-reflection that we grow.

Here are some tips on how to incorporate journaling into your life so that it becomes a regular habit.

Get the tools
Some people like to write in a notebook. If you are one of those people, get a brand-new notebook. It does not need to be expensive. If you want, creatively decorate the cover; add drawings or color, or stick on pictures or inspirational quotations. Some people like to journal on their tablet, phone, or computer. Experiment with pen and paper and digital journaling and see which one you enjoy more.

Commit to journaling at the same time every day
Just like developing any habit, try to journal at the same time every day. Many people journal right before they go to bed. Journaling before bedtime may help you sleep better because it clears your mind. It will also make you think about what you did during the day and how you can improve. Some people journal right after they wake up or while having their breakfast because writing energizes them for the day. However, if you miss your dedicated time, just journal at another time, and if (or when) you miss a day or two, don’t be hard on yourself. Just restart.

Have fun
No matter how or how much you write, have fun with it. If journaling starts to feel like a chore, play around, switch your approach, and experiment. There is no one-size-fits-all type of journaling. Remember, just because it’s a habit doesn’t mean it always has to be the same. Sometimes, write only a few sentences; other times, go deep into details and analyze an event. Find the style that works best for you.

Just write
Write about anything, whatever comes into your head. Don’t have any expectations, and don’t edit. Remember, you are the only person who is going to read your journal. Don’t try to write a certain amount. Some days you may write paragraphs and some days you may write a few sentences. Writing itself is the goal, not the amount or the stylistic quality. Pick a time, and just write.

Kristi Hugstad is the author of Be You, Only Better: Real-Life Self-Care for Young Adults (And Everyone Else) and two other books. A certified grief recovery specialist and a grief and loss facilitator for addicts in recovery, Kristi frequently speaks at high schools. She is also the host of The Grief Girl podcast and lives in Orange County, California. Visit her online at https://www.thegriefgirl.com.

Excerpted from the book from Be You, Only Better: Real-Life Self-Care for Young Adults (And Everyone Else). Copyright ©2021 by Kristi Hugstad. Printed with permission from New World Library .

We bought a new house about a year ago. We got it for an incredibly low price. At first I attributed this to the housing slump and felt really good about it; now I'm not so sure. The problem is that every several weeks, we are awakened in the middle of the night by a loud crashing sound. It always happens around two a.m., and it always sounds pretty much the same. The first time it happened, I thought we had an intruder. The second time it happened, I thought maybe something had collapsed or fallen over in the house. Now that it has happened many times, I just roll over and go back to sleep. While this doesn't feel creepy or ominous, it is unsettling. Do you think it could be paranormal? Is someone trying to get our attention?

Carol

Susyn:

Before purchasing a property, it is always a good idea to investigate its history. While there are indeed a lot of great deals are out there given the housing market slump, people have been known to sell off haunted houses for ridiculously low prices just to be free of them.

As you have already bought the property, I would check out a few other things before assuming you have a ghost. Since the crashing sound always occurs around the same time, it may be that a heater or cooling system is creating this noise. Sometimes loose pipes or temperature changes can cause loud noises. A licensed heating/cooling specialist should be able to rule this possibility out. Plumbing can also create all sorts of noises, so be sure to investigate this idea as well.

Once you have established that the sound is not coming from a physical source, it's time to head to your local library or search the internet for articles that may illuminate your house's history. If these efforts don't turn up anything, visit your county clerk's office to find more information.

Your neighbors may also be able to help you. If they have lived there a long time, they should be able to tell you of any strange events like violent crimes or tragic deaths that occurred in the house. They may even know about paranormal activity prior residents may have experienced.

There are two types of hauntings that can occur in a home. One is called a residual haunting where events from the past replay themselves. These hauntings are not dangerous, for they do not involve the presence of conscious metaphysical entities. The fact that the sound occurs at the same time in the night suggests that if something pararnormal is occuring, it's a residual haunting.

If this were an intelligent haunting, a conscious entity would be involved. I doubt that this is what you are dealing with, however, for you don't mention any other phenomena aside from this crashing noise. Intelligent hauntings tend to accelerate over time and are not limited to one location or type of event.

If there is something paranormal going on, you may be able to quiet things down by performing a cleansing and blessing ritual. Buy a sage smudge stick at your local metaphysical store. Light the stick and move from room to room with it, asking that all entities that do not belong there leave the premises at once. If you identify the exact location the sound is coming from, leave the smudge stick there for extra purification.

*****

Oceania:

It's possible that there is something paranormal happening; you may have a ghost or the energy of your home may be unbalanced. If this is the case, you could hire a professional to help clear your home's energy, or you could do some research and address the matter yourself using a methodology like feng shui. Of course, you could also continue to ignore it.

I think the paranormal offers the simplest and perhaps least interesting explanation. I like to view every life challenge as an opportunity for spiritual growth, so let's explore a deeper, more personal explanation for these disturbing events.

Psychologists sometimes use projective tests like the Rorschach to understand a client's internal world. In this particular test, clients describe what they see in inkblots. Since these inkblots have random shapes, everyone sees something different in them. Basically what an individual sees has nothing to do with the inkblot itself and everything to do with the viewer.

Our environments can also serve as projective tools. The things that catch our attention and the way we describe those things often says more about us than it does about what we're observing. According to the Law of Attraction, like energies attract, so whatever is going on in your life is a reflection of your vibration. By changing your thoughts and your feelings, you can change your life.

Taking the above notions into account, we might presume that you are noticing loud noises around two a.m. because they reflect something within you. The number two symbolizes relationship; loud crashes symbolize conflict.

Is it possible you have some inner tension or relationship conflict? You used the words intruder and collapsed or fallen over. Do you feel intruded upon, disrespected or violated? Do you feel like you or a relationship is collapsing or falling apart?

You also wrote that you roll over and go back to sleep. If you are indeed experiencing some inner conflict, we could translate that to I give up, surrender, and go back to minimizing the problem. I sweep it under the rug. Denial may work for a while, but as you've noticed, the conflict (crashes) will continue.

Though on a conscious level you may be quite content, there may some disappointment or conflict within yourself or your relationship that is trying to get your attention. If these crashes are signs of inner conflict, they should stop happening once that conflict has been resolved.

Astrea:

Many times in life we hear, "You will always have what you NEED, but not necessarily what you WANT." Your spirit must have needed to experience the feeling of leaving your human body, and the suggestion in the next chapter of Sylvia Brown's book was all it took to get you there.

Even though you hadn't read it yet, your SOUL recognized the title of that chapter as something it had been seeking, and your soul, knowing that you had that reference to read after your experience, got with it and out you went!

While I don't usually recommend her books, Sylvia Brown has a wide reaching and powerful effect on lots of people. A Gemini like you would be able to relate easily to her writing and put it to good use. Synchronicity - you gotta love it!

I like your description of "getting caught." That's exactly what it feels like, isn't it? One minute you're free and hovering above the room, and the next minute, ZAP! back down into your corporeal form you go!

As a little kid, I loved that "feeling of return." With practice, most of the time we can control that event, but sometimes, when our physical ears hear a distracting noise or something else occurs to knock us back into reality, back we go. With practice you will be able to control your return better.

I find it interesting that you were visiting your mother-in-law and not someone in your own genetic family. Evidently, you and your husband got married for reasons that are even deeper than love. His family's interest in "psychic stuff" will nurture your children in such matters and help them to grow into their own abilities.

You'll never have to be concerned that when your daughter visits them, she'll be discouraged from exploring her own psychic life and power. My parents encouraged me to develop my psychic senses in a time when it wasn't nice to even discuss such things in public. Heck, it's STILL not considered a great topic at the dinner table in some families!

Your kids will get to talk about it ALL and ask questions and read and study. This is going to give them such an edge in life! Talk with your husband about how you want to present this to your kiddos, so that you are united in your approach and ready to tell them their experiences are all natural and okay.

A word or two of warning: Geminis often have difficulty staying grounded in REAL LIFE. Don't get so strung out on your ASTRAL life that you neglect what you're doing here on Earth.

You are at the beginning of a long journey to learn where your power really lies. Try to be patient with this process and take your time.