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Your Intuitive Connection to Love, by Sherrie Dillard

(Article originally published in The Llewellyn Journal.)

Love and intuition seem to go together like peanut butter and jelly, the sun and the moon and…well, like two people in love. Who at one time or another has not felt a shiver move up their spine or their stomach leap in joy when looking into another’s eyes? Have you ever met someone and instantly felt a connection with them or somehow knew what they were thinking or feeling, without knowing how you knew? These are spontaneous natural occurrences of intuition and they can be so commonplace we often take them for granted.

We all have innate intuitive ability, which can be as simple as knowing something without knowing how you know it. Yet intuition, like love, can be mysterious and compelling and can bypass the rational and logical. This is because both love and intuition have their roots in the soul —the deeper, wiser part of us. They are both powerful energies that can enhance every aspect of your life. Knowing one will gain you instant access into a better understanding of the other.

Your intuition is as unique as you. I have discovered through many years of teaching others to access and develop their innate intuitive ability that intuition surfaces in four primary ways. You may receive energy information through your thoughts, your emotions, your energy field or your physical body. These four different intuitive modalities make up your intuitive type.

If you intuit mostly through your thoughts and ideas, you are a mental intuitive. Mental intuitives are naturally telepathic. Telepathy is the ability to tune into, receive, and send thought messages to another or a group. Emotional intuitives intuit mostly through their emotions. If you tend to easily pick up on others' feelings, are empathetic and tend to be the go-to person for your friends and family who are in need of a kind shoulder, you are likely an emotional intuitive. Spiritual intuitives receive intuitive vibrations through their energy field. Those who can perceive angels and auras have an active dream life and enjoy daydreaming may be spiritual intuitives. Physical intuitives absorb energy information into their body. Do you ever feel others' aches and pains or feel flushed and warm just sitting next to certain people? If so, you may be a physical intuitive.

Once you are aware of your intuitive type, you will be able to develop and use your natural intuition with more ease and success. Your intuitive type also plays an important part in your ability to communicate, understand, and increase intimacy with loved ones.

How is this? Do you ever know what your partner is thinking or suddenly feel that a loved one is having difficulties, even though they are miles away? Do you ever dream about a loved one who has passed over and feel their presence, almost as if they are in the same room with you? Does it seem like just holding your partner's hand helps you to know her better? While these situations are often random and unpredictable, you can learn how to better tune into and understand your particular intuitive strengths.

The bond of love between two people strengthens and intensifies intuitive ability. With this in mind, not only will you get better results when developing your intuition with a friend or partner, mutual understanding and insight into one another will also increase.

The following is a partner exercise. It will give you the opportunity to develop your intuition and gain insight into a partner, friend, or family member at the same time. It will also help you to experience how each intuitive type receives energy information.

To begin, find a time of day where you and your partner can both be undisturbed for an agreed-upon amount of time. It is not necessary to be in the same physical location. You can be across town or even across the country —it doesn't matter; just make sure that your time zones are in sync.

At the agreed-upon time sit or lie down, close your eyes and begin to take long, deep, relaxing breaths. Imagine as you breathe that you are inhaling cleansing and clearing breaths and you are exhaling any stress and tension. As you settle into the natural rhythm of these cleansing breaths, visualize your partner. Use your imagination and form a picture of them in your mind's eye. Don't force it. Rather, breathe, relax, and feel your connection to them. Keep visualizing your partner and wait for them to smile or acknowledge your presence. This is an intuitive exercise so you might just "know" or get a sense of when they become aware of you. Intuitive "seeing" is not always the same as three-dimensional seeing. It might feel like you are relying on your imagination, which is good. Keep it up.

Now practice one or more of these intuitive communication techniques.

• Mental Intuition:
  Take a long, deep breath and as you exhale, imagine that you are releasing and letting go of your thoughts and mind chatter. Keep breathing and releasing; notice your thoughts without attaching any importance to them. Eventually they will dissipate.

Now imagine that your mind is expanding and encompassing your partner's mind. Tune into their thoughts. Imagine that they have a message for you. Send them a thought, such as "What would you like me to know?" or "How is your day?" Project this thought and then breathe, relax and focus on the breath. This will help to clear your mind. Stay in this calm place for a few moments and receive whatever comes in, without over-thinking or allowing your mind to stray.

When you feel as if your concentration and focus is wavering, send a warm thank you to your partner. Take a few deep breaths and imagine that any negativity and stress is being released through the out breath. Breathe in love, fill yourself with its warm refreshing current and send this cleansing and clearing energy to your partner. Open your eyes and write down whatever you received.

• Emotional Intuition:
  Before you begin, it helps to first become aware of what you are feeling. You might want to put words to your emotions. Are you in a good mood, frustrated, tired, happy, or maybe a combination of different emotions? As you put words to how you feel, imagine that you can release these feelings through calm breathing. Keep breathing relaxing breaths and exhaling your emotional energy.

When you feel calm, take a long deep inhale and exhale through your heart. Keep breathing in this way, cleansing inhales and exhales through the heart. Imagine that the energy of your heart expands and encompasses your partner. Feel your partner in your heart energy and feel what they feel. Are they happy, serene, having a good day, irritated or fatigued? Keep breathing and feel what they are feeling. When you feel as if you have become aware of as much of their emotional energy as you can at this time, breathe and send them love. Imagine that as you inhale, warm waves of love move through you. You can send this love to your partner. Imagine love filling your partner. Breathe and allow your partner to move out of your heart energy and into their own space as you move into yours. Open your eyes.

• Spiritual Intuition:
  Imagine your partner. In your mind’s eye see them sitting or lying down and notice anything you can about them. Go to them. Spiritual intuitives often have the natural gift of being able to energetically transport themselves to distant locations. Keep it simple and trust your energy wisdom to take you to them. As you draw close, imagine that you can perceive the energy that surrounds them. Use your imagination and tune into their energy field or aura. These waves of energy will appear to you in different colors, hues and levels of vibrancy. Again, don't over-think this. Just activate your higher knowing through intent. You may be able to observe your partner's angels or spirit guides: just allow this to happen. They might even have a message for you to convey to your partner.

Take in what you are experiencing, relax into the energy and imagine your partner completely surrounded by a bubble of white light. This light is loving and protective. Now return to your own physical space and imagine that you too are surrounded by white light. Come back completely into the body and open your eyes.

• Physical Intuition:
  If you are a physical intuitive you might want to hold a photograph of your partner or one of their personal objects. Intuiting information through the energy imprint of a photo or personal object is called psychometry. Physical intuitives have a special knack for being able to receive intuitive information in this way. Close your eyes and breathe. Imagine white light healing energy moving down through the top of your head. Move this healing energy through your entire body. Notice any place in your body where you are tight or tense. Breathe into these places and release any tension through the exhale. Continue this process until you feel relaxed and stress-free. Now, imagine your partner. Use your imagination to do this. Intend to become aware of what they are experiencing. You might have the most success with this if you now tune into your own body. Move your awareness through your body and imagine that you can experience what your partner is experiencing. Are you stressed, anxious, relaxed, or full of energy and stamina? Go to any place in your body where you feel tension or stress and imagine sending warm love to this area. Release the stress and continue to breathe. Are there any unusual aches and pains; do you feel a headache, or light and full of life? Keep tuning in and send healing wherever it is needed. When you have experienced all that you can for now, allow your partner to move their energy back into their own body. You can do this through simple intent. They are now in their body and you are in yours. Take a few deep breaths and move white light healing energy through your body. Feel your body fill with energy vibrancy and love. Send this same energy to your partner.

When you are ready open your eyes.

Love is a potent life-force energy that is not restricted by time, space or condition. It has no barriers and there is no power in this world that is stronger than it. With love, two people become one. Develop your intuitive connection to love and allow its powerful presence and mystery to unfold in your life.

Article originally published in The Llewellyn Journal. Copyright Llewellyn Worldwide, 2010. All rights reserved.

My husband and I have been together for nine years. Before I met him, I had been on an emotional roller coaster and wanted to find stability in my life. I believe my mistake was that I was searching for someone else to provide that stability, and he became my best friend. However, our backgrounds are very different. He grew up in a strong Christian community. As I did not, I didn't understand his apparent lack of sexual interest in me. I spoke to him about this before marriage but we never truly dealt with it. I assumed it would get better once we were husband and wife. I was wrong. The first year of our marriage was fine because we were working together to completely renovate our house, but ever since then, the lack of passion has bothered me very much. We have seen a counselor about it and efforts are being made to make things better, but I can't help but feel something will always be missing for me. I know I love and care for him, as he is a great guy, but I don't think I am in love with him. My heart feels so torn: Why can't I just be content with what I have: a stable but emotionally dull relationship? I am so confused. What do you think?

S.

Astrea:

Many people feel as you do after many years of marriage: They love the person they married but they no longer feel the intense passion they did in the beginning.

Every month, popular magazines offer some magic formula for rekindling the passion in a worn-out marriage or dying relationship. Every year, people spend millions of dollars on counseling and various products for the same reason.

We're taught that life is supposed to be exciting all the time, and we're conditioned by television and movies to think that we're always supposed to feel the same about someone we love.

In a thirty-minute situation comedy or an hour-long drama, we see people falling madly in love with one another and living happily ever after. When we see serious relationship conflicts followed by passionate reconciliations week after week, we naturally think we might be missing something.

The reason people can't be content with what they have is because we're taught by advertising and the media that we always need and deserve more. Of course, for some people there is always a fly in the food somewhere. If the relationship is satisfying physically, then they feel emotionally bereft; if the relationship is stable, they feel bored.

In real life, living with other people is stressful, and when we feel worn down or overwhelmed, it's natural to wonder how things could be better. You've been with your husband for a long time, however, and that's worth something too.

Can anyone love anyone else ALL the time? Can passion be constant? When the kids are crying, the dog has left a mess on the floor and the bills are due, it's pretty darn hard to feel romantic.

I won't argue that passion drives some relationships. As unrealistic as that is, it's probably possible. You, however, chose your husband for stability. Even then, you felt you were settling for less excitement than you wanted. Maybe that was a mistake, and maybe not. At the time it seemed like a smart trade-off, but now you're bored and probably a little lonesome too.

You crave newness and excitement. Millions of people are feeling the same right this moment. The wonderful thing about being human is that we can make changes.

If you talk to your husband sincerely about how you feel, I'm sure the two of you can work this out together. If you can't do it alone, join a support group and find a good marriage counselor. Let an expert take the heat. If you discover that you really don't love each other, you can always move on to something else.

*****

Susyn:

Your concerns about your marriage are well-founded. In fact, you bring up an issue that many people are struggling with. People have different views of what marriage can or should be. We all come from different backgrounds, and have all sorts of issues regarding passion and sexuality.

Society has shifted its priorities over the last few decades, and as a whole, we tend to focus on what we think we are missing instead of cherishing what we have. However, your letter suggests that you've reached a point where it may be more than passion you are missing in your marriage.

It appears you settled for what could bring you the most stability at the time. Though it may seem like you're missing something, it's important to consider whether or not what you want is available to you.

If you've done some soul searching and experienced personal growth over the last nine years, then your inner being may be urging you to reach for a higher level of experience. If you haven't changed within this period, however, you could find yourself right back at the place you were so desperate to leave - on an emotional roller coaster again.

As the only one who can determine whether or not you should stay in this marriage is you, I recommend you seek individual counseling as the first step toward gaining more clarity. In addition, meditation and spiritual practices designed to connect you with your inner truths will help you figure out what your heart and soul are telling you.

Unfortunately, leaving one situation to pursue another is rarely the answer. If you would rather live alone for the rest of your life than remain in a passionless marriage, then you have nothing to lose. Just don't assume that if you let leave this marriage, another better relationship will appear to take its place.

If you've reached the point where you are ready for change, turning to Spirit for direction is definitely the answer. Allowing a higher source to lead you forward is the way to go. If you start to experience signs that it's time for you open up to other possibilities, the urgings of your heart will lead you to greater fulfillment.

Do keep in mind as you work on yourself that everyone has different ideas about marriage, and there are women who would love to be in your shoes. Your job now is to find out if you can find contentment within instead of looking for it outside of yourself. Once you can find contentment within regardless of outer circumstances, you'll be able to make a sound choice about your future.

Astrea:

Many times in life we hear, "You will always have what you NEED, but not necessarily what you WANT." Your spirit must have needed to experience the feeling of leaving your human body, and the suggestion in the next chapter of Sylvia Brown's book was all it took to get you there.

Even though you hadn't read it yet, your SOUL recognized the title of that chapter as something it had been seeking, and your soul, knowing that you had that reference to read after your experience, got with it and out you went!

While I don't usually recommend her books, Sylvia Brown has a wide reaching and powerful effect on lots of people. A Gemini like you would be able to relate easily to her writing and put it to good use. Synchronicity - you gotta love it!

I like your description of "getting caught." That's exactly what it feels like, isn't it? One minute you're free and hovering above the room, and the next minute, ZAP! back down into your corporeal form you go!

As a little kid, I loved that "feeling of return." With practice, most of the time we can control that event, but sometimes, when our physical ears hear a distracting noise or something else occurs to knock us back into reality, back we go. With practice you will be able to control your return better.

I find it interesting that you were visiting your mother-in-law and not someone in your own genetic family. Evidently, you and your husband got married for reasons that are even deeper than love. His family's interest in "psychic stuff" will nurture your children in such matters and help them to grow into their own abilities.

You'll never have to be concerned that when your daughter visits them, she'll be discouraged from exploring her own psychic life and power. My parents encouraged me to develop my psychic senses in a time when it wasn't nice to even discuss such things in public. Heck, it's STILL not considered a great topic at the dinner table in some families!

Your kids will get to talk about it ALL and ask questions and read and study. This is going to give them such an edge in life! Talk with your husband about how you want to present this to your kiddos, so that you are united in your approach and ready to tell them their experiences are all natural and okay.

A word or two of warning: Geminis often have difficulty staying grounded in REAL LIFE. Don't get so strung out on your ASTRAL life that you neglect what you're doing here on Earth.

You are at the beginning of a long journey to learn where your power really lies. Try to be patient with this process and take your time.