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    • 4 Secret Strengths of Sensitivity

      by Kyra Mesich, PsyD

      (Article originally published in The Llewellyn Journal.)

      Sensitive people have gotten a bum rap. We live in a world that doesn't embrace the values of sensitivity, so we get told that we are weak, unusual, touchy, and hard to please. The sad truth is that we hear these messages in many ways throughout our lives. Even if it is from a well-meaning teacher or parent who tries to "toughen us up," the crux of these messages is that there is something wrong with being sensitive.

      When we hear these messages over and over through our lives, we can't help but internalize them as our own identity. Therefore, most sensitive people truly do believe that there is something wrong with them and that they are at fault for being "too sensitive."

      It's no wonder then that sensitive people don't know how to respond when someone derails a discussion or argument by saying, "You're just being too sensitive." How can we have a rebuttal to that statement, when a part of us believes it is true? Deep down inside, most sensitive people believe that their sensitivity is a weakness, and they dislike being that way. It's an inequitable way to live to not appreciate or even like an important part of ourselves, especially when the ideas are based in misunderstanding.

      Would you believe it if I told you that your sensitivity is actually composed of many different strengths? Here are four of the secret strengths of sensitivity.

      1. You're Highly Perceptive.
        Think for a moment about the word "sensitive." How does that word make you feel? What associations do you have with the word? Now think about the word "perceptive." How does that word make you feel? For most people, the word "sensitive" is an emotionally laden word with some negative connotations. On the other hand, the word "perceptive" is neutral. So what would happen if you replaced the word sensitive and started defining and describing yourself instead as highly perceptive? Feel the shift that happens?This is not to say that "sensitive" is a negative word. It's an emotionally charged word due to our past experiences. It's freeing to take a little time off from that misunderstood term. "Perceptive" is a synonym that still has its pure, straightforward meaning: having keen awareness, understanding, and intuition.

        So the next time you begin to think to yourself, "I wish I wasn't so sensitive," stop and instead say, "I wish I wasn't so perceptive." You'll find yourself replying, "Why would I do that? Being perceptive is a good thing!"

      2. Your Brain is More Active.
        According to studies by Doctors Elaine and Arthur Aron and colleagues at Stony Brook University, the brains of sensitive people brains have higher activity in response to stimuli. In one particular study, participants' brain activity was monitored by functional magnetic resonance imaging while viewing a series of photos of people exhibiting varied emotions. The participants identified as highly sensitive had much greater blood flow in their brains than the other participants, indicating higher brain activity. Similar results have been demonstrated with other stimuli as well. What this means is that the physiology of sensitive people physiology is indeed more active and responsive.Sensitivity isn't solely an emotional or mental experience; our entire physiology is wired to react swiftly, keenly, and thoroughly to stimuli. This is the reason we sometimes perceive things that others don't seem to notice. This is an explanation for why we may feel bombarded by loud or discordant stimuli. Our bodies are doing more work to perceive accurately and keenly. In other words, we are more finely tuned instruments.
      3. You Have Great Intuition.
        Intuition is that gut feeling or still, small voice within that we can trust to know the best course of action. Our intuition is our inner guidance system that helps things run much more smoothly in our lives, as long as we listen to it. As a sensitive person, you already have very strong intuition. The problem is that most of us were never taught to value it nor how to listen to it. We're taught to dismiss it.Our society praises actions that are taken after much analysis and thought. It's generally not accepted that someone may be sensitive enough to perceive subtle information from multiple sources beyond the thoughts in the mind and then just "know" what to do. That is a big part of what makes our sensitivity so baffling, yet makes it a huge strength. We are sensitive not only to what we can easily see and understand, but also to that which is extrasensory—just beyond what our five physical senses can perceive. This includes things such as EMF, radiation, magnetic fields, and many additional energies from devices, nature, animals, and people.

        Our sensitive intuition picks up on all this extrasensory information, compiles it, and does its best to tell us what we need to know. Since it is already working all the time, practice listening to your intuition and try following it, even for simple things like what time to choose for an appointment. Many people are better able to sense their intuition when they tune into their bodies, especially the solar plexus area, rather than focusing all attention up in their heads. Give yourself permission to listen to your gut feelings and instincts for a while, and you'll find your intuition is a fabulous resource and strength you naturally have as a sensitive person.

      4. You're Empathic.
        People use the word "empathic" to mean compassionate understanding of another person's emotional situation. But the term "empathic" has an even deeper meaning for sensitive people. This is an extension of the discussion about intuition in number two. Empathic ability can be viewed as a specific type of intuition, or extrasensory awareness.Empathic ability is the experience of sensing and feeling emotional energy, even if it hasn't been openly communicated in any way. This emotional energy may be lingering in a place, or it may come from animals or pets, but it impacts us most strongly when it is from other people. This is one of the confusing aspects of sensitivity that we often define as painful or as a weakness. When we don't realize we are empathic, then the emotions we sense from others become jumbled up with our own.

        But when we do know that empathic ability exists, and that as sensitive people we are empathic, then we can begin to discern the energy we are sensing. As we learn to use and appreciate our empathic abilities, eventually we are able to use that emotional information just like our intuition—as useful information that benefits us.

        Wondering if you can trust your new babysitter? Is your boss in the right mood today to ask for that raise? Will you get along with the neighbors at the new apartment you are considering? These are questions your empathic sensitivity can answer. It adds another layer of information to your intuition. It's like having a psychic feeling superpower.

        Just as with intuition, it works best to tune into your empathic ability by bringing your awareness to the solar plexus area of your body, between your chest and belly. Ask a question, and then trust the immediate feeling that comes to you. It takes practice and sometimes healing of old wounds or blockages so that you can clearly perceive what your empathic sensitivity is trying to tell you. But you can get there.

      Wouldn't you agree that it's time for these strengths of sensitivity to no longer be secrets? The idea that sensitivity is a weakness really is backwards. Sensitivity is a great example of "the whole is greater than the sum of the parts." Our keen perception, strong physiological responsiveness, and compassionate nature give us the ability to hear more, feel more, and sense more, even beyond the limitations of our five physical senses.

      It's time for us to recognize these strengths and begin respecting ourselves as sensitive people. So the next time someone says, "You’re being too sensitive," you can honestly reply, "Thank you. What a nice compliment."

      Article originally published in The Llewellyn Journal. Copyright Llewellyn Worldwide, 2016. All rights reserved.

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    • Double Vision: Can a Living or "Virtual" Person be a Spirit Guide?

      30-insp-oct

      I was told by a very respectable medium that my spirit guide is a woman in her 40s. A few weeks after this reading, my teacher from an online class asked me to keep in touch, and we exchanged email addresses. She is a woman in her forties. I am wondering if there is any connection to what the medium told me. I am going through a stressful time right now, and my online teacher helps me tremendously. Is it possible she is my spirit guide? If so, does she even exist in the physical dimension?

      Michelle

      Dreamchaser:

      I’m sure many people wonder this very thing. To begin, let’s clarify the term “spirit guide.” Spirit guides are people who once walked the earth, finished their lessons, are now in the non-physical, and have chosen to become teachers for those of us on earth now.

      We get two main spirit guides in life: One human and one animal. As we grow and learn, these guides will at times step back and allow specific teaching guides to step in. For example, if we are learning about patience, our main guides may step into the background so a specific spirit guide specializing in patience can help us.

      A medium told you that your main human spirit guide is a woman in her 40s, and now you’ve formed a bond with a helpful spiritual teacher in her 40s, but this doesn’t necessarily mean your teacher is your spirit guide. This reminds me of that old saying, “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.” Our spirit guides are not the only ones who can guide us. You needed help, and a teacher arrived for you.

      Your spirit guide and this teacher are not one and the same; they are two different beings. There are four equal worlds: Mental, emotional, physical and spiritual. We humans put an amazing amount of stock in the physical, and tend to think of the other three as less important or less powerful. When it comes to spiritual matters, however, we may tend to value physical sources of help too little.

      We can have incredible bonds and friendships with people who are not actually living in our physical world, but we can also have similar bonds with people who are alive here on earth but at a distance from us. You know that we do not need to be sitting in the same room with someone to feel their energy or share experiences with them. Your relationship with your teacher proves these bonds can be very helpful and powerful.

      I firmly believe that the internet is a virtual hot bed of spiritual activity. I can find answers on the internet to just about any question I think up. For people on a spiritual quest, that is huge. I often wonder if people I chat with are human or from another dimension.

      As far as your teacher goes, does it matter if she is in this dimension or another? You two have a close bond, and she is helping you – that is what matters.

      I wish you continued guidance from all avenues.

      *****

      Astrea:

      Finding our guides can be an exciting experience, especially for those of us who remember having some kind of communication with them when we were children. A guide can manifest in hundreds of different ways; the experience is different for everyone. What you share and experience with your guides is unique to you, and you’re the only one who can feel it or see them. Others may be able to access them for you from time to time, but what they show you is usually only for you; it is reserved by your guides for you alone.

      Each of us begins with two guides. One is an angelic spirit that becomes our conscience. The other can be the spirit of a person who has lived on earth, such as a relative or someone else who liked our energy at the time we were born, and agreed to be one of the two main guides assigned to help and guide us. Each astrological sign is also assigned an archangel and a messenger angel who carry our prayers and supplications to God.

      During the time we are on earth, these guides come to us in many ways and in many forms. Some are guardian angels who look after us or protect us when we’re in danger. Sometimes our relatives who have crossed over come to us in dreams to guide us through a rough time. In times of great stress, others are called upon to come to us to help us with specific situations. You can always call your angels and guides to help you when you’re feeling depressed or when you’re in trouble and need help.

      Angels and spirits aren’t the only guides we will be blessed with in our lives. Parents, teachers, children, husbands, siblings, counselors and friends all guide us every day. The people we work with guide us at work, and our families give us guidance – sometimes even when we don’t ask them for it!

      While it’s certainly possible that your online teacher is a guide to you, she is a real person. While I have heard of spirits communicating through automatic writing on the computer, this isn’t the case in your situation. Your teacher is a living, breathing human being – someone you could meet in person if you ever wanted to, providing that they don’t live too far away. While it may be fun to pretend she is a spirit, she’s as real in this dimension as you and me.

      Don’t value her guidance any less just because it’s coming from someone as alive as you are!

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