Showing Up Doesn’t Always Have to Be on Purpose

An Excerpt from Sit Down to Rise Up by Shelly Tygielski

My friend Soren Gordhamer, the founder of Wisdom 2.0, an annual conference that explores the intersection of modern life and technology, once told me a story about how he used to take his young son to the local water park every summer. Each time, his son glanced up at the tallest waterslide, with its spiraling staircase, and remarked enthusiastically: “Next year, I’ll be tall enough to go up there!” Finally, after several summers, his son reached the height requirement to climb those stairs and fulfill his dream of sliding down the “big boy” slide. As Soren watched his son’s bobbing head, barely visible over the banister, make the ascent to the top landing, Soren rushed over to the pool where the slide spit out riders. As he waited earnestly for his son, he watched one exhilarated rider after another appear. After fifteen minutes, he felt a tap on the back of his arm. He spun around to find his son standing there looking distraught.

“What’s up buddy? What happened? Is everything okay?”

“I was too scared to go down,” his son explained. His son said he had stood watching person after person grab the overhang bar, sit down, and scoot forward, and he had attempted many times to do the same, but each time he hopped out of the wading pool and back onto the concrete. Finally, he resolved to walk down the stairs, head hanging low in disappointment. Soren said something to the effect of “We’ll get ’em next time.” The summer was long, and there would be plenty of opportunities to conquer the slide on their next visit to the park, but to his surprise, his son insisted on trying again right away. Soren chuckled and found inspiration in his son’s resolve to tackle his fears head on and with such determination. He watched his son turn toward the stairs again and make his way back up. When he could no longer see him, he turned his attention to the pool, and again, person after person plunged off the slide’s end, but not his son. After about ten minutes, Soren instinctively looked toward the stairs, and sure enough, a familiar blond-haired head was bobbing down and making its way toward him.

This routine happened several times in succession. Up and down, up and down … until finally, Soren saw his son’s blond head coming down the slide, slowly winding its way around and back, until he eventually emerged in the pool. With incredible excitement, Soren entered the pool as his son swam over to him. His son had the widest smile, grinning from ear to ear and beaming with pride! Soren felt sympathetic joy and pride in his son. What a huge moment! As they exited the pool, Soren turned to his son and said, “Hey buddy, that was amazing! I am so impressed with your tenacity and resolve. I’m curious to know … what changed for you this last time? How did you finally get the courage to just go for it?”

His son stopped short, looked up at him with his big eyes, and said, “Well, Dad, I stood there holding the bar, and I got scared again, and I was about to come back down, and then … I just slipped!”

I love this story so much. It reminds me that we don’t always have to be deliberately courageous in order to take the leap. We can accidentally slip into things that can be important, exhilarating, paradigm-shifting, and impactful. The most important thing we can do is just show up, intentionally and consistently. If we show up again and again, the chances of us taking the plunge in life’s biggest moments — even if we are not entirely prepared — is almost guaranteed.


Shelly Tygielski is the author of Sit Down to Rise Up and founder of the global grassroots mutual aid organization Pandemic of Love.  Her work has been featured by over 100 media outlets, including CNN Heroes, The Kelly Clarkson Show, CBS This Morning, the New York Times, and the Washington Post. Visit her online at shellytygielski.com.

Excerpted from the book from Sit Down to Rise Up. Copyright ©2021 by Shelly Tygielski. Printed with permission from New World Library.