I have a coworker who is a bully. She has caused problems for others in my department, and recently I caught her slandering me. I had my boss help me confront her, after which she blabbed to everyone about what I had accused her of saying. (I had told only my boss.) Now she wants a letter of apology. I tried the freezing tool Susyn recommended but it hasn't helped. What should I do?
It sounds like this coworker is not your only problem. If others have had trouble with this bully yet your boss still repeated what you said to her, your boss may be making things worse, for now she may feel she has control of the situation and can do whatever she wants. If your boss refuses to appropriately deal with this troublemaker, you may have to freeze him as well. When a negative person has a great deal of power, it can take two or three freezings for the spell to be effective. However, because this situation appears to involve a number of people, more action may be required.
There is great power in numbers. If you can speak with the other people she has troubled and join forces with them, you may be able to write a group letter to your bossí supervisor. If you and your coworkers don't feel comfortable with this approach, you can each perform rituals to disarm this woman. For starters, you might have everyone who has been affected by her try the freezing ritual.
It does not sound like you or your coworker plan to leave the company soon, so here are a few rituals you can try in the office to create more protection around you. You can also share these with others who are looking for a solution.
Start with color therapy to deflect this personís energy. Indigo, yellow and white can create an invisible barrier around you and add to your protection. You might wear clothing or gemstones in these hues, put flowers on your desk, or place objects in your desk drawer to generate a deflective aura.
The color indigo encourages clarity of thought and speech. It will protect you from saying too much or giving away information she can later use to attack you. Yellow represents personal power; it will create an aura of confidence around you that will make her think twice about bullying you. White will surround you with spiritual protection and strengthen your intuition so you can move with wise awareness when around her.
I would also recommend you place a mirror in your drawer or carry one in your purse to reflect back to others any negative energy they send your way. When you sense that she is targeting you or preparing to cause trouble, stop and visualize a mirror in front of your power chakra, which is located in the stomach area. This will send any negative energy she aims at you back to her tenfold.
Metaphysically, the Universe is offering you an important lesson through this experience. Once you've learned how to speak up for and protect yourself, her antics should subside.
Since some of your coworkers have also had problems with this bully, her behavior is obviously not about you. Knowing this should make it easier for you to not take her behavior personally.
Letting go of your personal feelings about what this person has said and done will lift you above ego and empower you to transform this situation with love and wisdom. It would be wise to let go of needing to look like you triumph over her, for any such desire is a sign that she is dragging you down to her level. In fact, if you truly want to be free, you may have to let her think she has won.
Instead of trying to win this battle, focus on winning the war. By this, I mean strive to lift yourself above all of this drama so you can attract a higher quality of people and experience.
Once you are no longer angry or upset with her because you're not taking any of this personally, you might be able to find your way to feeling some compassion for her. People who are angry and aggressive aren't happy; they are simply externalizing their own fear and pain. This woman is clearly not at peace in her own life and is making enemies right and left; can you imagine how miserable it must be to be her?
Once you feel some compassion for her, your goal is to show her kindness regardless of what she says or does. If you find this difficult, this article by Alan Cohen may inspire you to see the situation in a different light.
If you attempt to
kill this bullying with kindness, you may or may not begin to bring out some of this woman's better traits, but you will certainly lift yourself into a higher level of experience. It is essential to be sincere, of course, for what you send out will come back to you. Remember: fighting a bully will lead to more fighting, while making peace with a bully will lead to more peace.
One thing that helps me a great deal is to always remember that what we say about other people is what they believe to be true about us. If this bully calls someone else a liar, people think of her as a liar. The more she talks trash about others, the more despised she becomes.
Similarly, the kinder you are when talking about her, the more you will shine through as a wonderful person. Eventually, nothing bad she says about you will stick. In fact, if you have had nothing but good things to say about her and others, your boss and coworkers will leap to your defense if she or anyone else ever tries to attack your character again.
Many times in life we hear, "You will always have what you NEED, but not necessarily what you WANT." Your spirit must have needed to experience the feeling of leaving your human body, and the suggestion in the next chapter of Sylvia Brown's book was all it took to get you there.
Even though you hadn't read it yet, your SOUL recognized the title of that chapter as something it had been seeking, and your soul, knowing that you had that reference to read after your experience, got with it and out you went!
While I don't usually recommend her books, Sylvia Brown has a wide reaching and powerful effect on lots of people. A Gemini like you would be able to relate easily to her writing and put it to good use. Synchronicity - you gotta love it!
I like your description of "getting caught." That's exactly what it feels like, isn't it? One minute you're free and hovering above the room, and the next minute, ZAP! back down into your corporeal form you go!
As a little kid, I loved that "feeling of return." With practice, most of the time we can control that event, but sometimes, when our physical ears hear a distracting noise or something else occurs to knock us back into reality, back we go. With practice you will be able to control your return better.
I find it interesting that you were visiting your mother-in-law and not someone in your own genetic family. Evidently, you and your husband got married for reasons that are even deeper than love. His family's interest in "psychic stuff" will nurture your children in such matters and help them to grow into their own abilities.
You'll never have to be concerned that when your daughter visits them, she'll be discouraged from exploring her own psychic life and power. My parents encouraged me to develop my psychic senses in a time when it wasn't nice to even discuss such things in public. Heck, it's STILL not considered a great topic at the dinner table in some families!
Your kids will get to talk about it ALL and ask questions and read and study. This is going to give them such an edge in life! Talk with your husband about how you want to present this to your kiddos, so that you are united in your approach and ready to tell them their experiences are all natural and okay.
A word or two of warning: Geminis often have difficulty staying grounded in REAL LIFE. Don't get so strung out on your ASTRAL life that you neglect what you're doing here on Earth.
You are at the beginning of a long journey to learn where your power really lies. Try to be patient with this process and take your time.