Hi my name is Sanet. My husband passed away January 13, 2010. Two nights ago I had a dream about him. I dreamed that he walked into my room alive. I asked him how it was possible that he was alive. He said he had met a woman through my niece's ex-boyfriend who was rich, and that together they had faked his death. In my dream I felt betrayed, depressed and sad. I asked him how he could do this to me and his son. It felt like he was laughing at me. We also argued about money. (When my husband passed away, he did not have work or any policies, so we were basically broke.) I cried in my dream, for I felt he had betrayed me and my son by faking his death. What do you think this means?
Sanet
Susyn:
This kind of dream happens more often than you might imagine. In fact, I had the same experience when my husband died many years ago. I not only dreamed that he had faked his death, I would also sometimes spot someone on the street who looked just like him and be so sure it was him that I would turn the car around and drive by again. For years, it was difficult to shake the idea that somehow, my husband was still alive. These dreams would haunt me for weeks because they seemed so real.
In my own case, I never saw my husband's remains before he was cremated, which may have led to my recurring dreams that he was still alive. I am not sure if this was the case with you, but if it was, it may explain why you are having a hard time fully absorbing the idea that your husband has died.
I don't believe these dreams are telling you that he actually faked his death. I also do not believe that your husband has anything to do with you having these dreams. Instead, these dreams are trying to help you process old or new fears by bringing them up in the dream state so you can reexperience them and then heal and release them.
You mentioned that you argued about money when you were together. Perhaps you also carried some fears about him betraying you. As dreams are often attempts to process our deepest fears, it's possible that even though your husband passed away almost three years ago, you are still working on resolving some of the feelings and issues that came up during your marriage.
Here's another way to view this dream: in thinking that he is still alive and has betrayed you, you are processing his death is a sideways manner. His leaving you and your son behind is a betrayal of sorts. Because he left you penniless, you dream that he ran off with a rich woman. This fear is rooted in the fact that he was unable to provide for you, your son or himself.
Usually a dream like this one will clear out the old fears you subconsciously carry. However, if you continue to have similar dreams, you may want to consider grief counseling in order to resolve any lingering resentment or anxiety you may be carrying. I also recommended performing a guided forgiveness meditation. Gather a few favorite objects or pictures of your husband, two white candles, and some sage incense. Light the incense and candles, and then tell your husband that you forgive him for abandoning you and your son and for leaving you in a financial crisis. Once you forgive him, true healing can begin.
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Oceania:
You felt betrayed, depressed and sad in your dream because you really are feeling that way! During our waking lives, we're often too busy to notice what we're feeling, which is why some people feel teary when they pause to take some deep breaths or meditate. When we create quiet mental space with no distractions, our feelings seep into our awareness where they can be felt and acknowledged.
Sleep is a state of few distractions, so feelings that have been ignored during the day often find expression in our dreams. The actual source of our feelings is often disguised in dreams in order to make those feelings more tolerable. For example, you ARE feeling betrayed, but not because your husband faked his death; the real source of that feeling is the fact that he left you financially insecure. You ARE feeling depressed, but not because your husband conspired with another woman; you are sad because your husband died young.
Dreams can provide us with a temporary sense of relief and resolution when a situation in our waking life feels unsettled or unacceptable. This is similar to the bargaining stage of grief, where the mind plays out alternative realities in search of one that feels better or makes more sense.
Your mind was bargaining when it considered the following: Instead of dying and leaving us broke, maybe my husband ran off with another woman - one with wealthy connections. That explanation is less final than death and allows for the possibility that he will return someday with newfound financial security.
Money can feel symbolic of love, so given that your husband was not providing for you, it may feel as if he didn't love you and your son. It is important to recognize that this is not necessarily the case. Some people just aren't good at managing money. Men especially often hide this weakness rather than admit they need help prioritizing expenses and balancing the family budget. If you can forgive this weakness of his, it will allow you to enjoy fond memories of his strengths.
While it is easy to blame others for our hardships, that point of view places us in a victim mentality. Taking responsibility for our lives and committing to creatively solving our problems is a more empowered position. Your seeming crisis is an opportunity to create the financial security you desire. You can move towards your goal by partnering discipline and perseverance with humbly asking for guidance and support from powers greater than yourself.
Astrea:
Many times in life we hear, "You will always have what you NEED, but not necessarily what you WANT." Your spirit must have needed to experience the feeling of leaving your human body, and the suggestion in the next chapter of Sylvia Brown's book was all it took to get you there.
Even though you hadn't read it yet, your SOUL recognized the title of that chapter as something it had been seeking, and your soul, knowing that you had that reference to read after your experience, got with it and out you went!
While I don't usually recommend her books, Sylvia Brown has a wide reaching and powerful effect on lots of people. A Gemini like you would be able to relate easily to her writing and put it to good use. Synchronicity - you gotta love it!
I like your description of "getting caught." That's exactly what it feels like, isn't it? One minute you're free and hovering above the room, and the next minute, ZAP! back down into your corporeal form you go!
As a little kid, I loved that "feeling of return." With practice, most of the time we can control that event, but sometimes, when our physical ears hear a distracting noise or something else occurs to knock us back into reality, back we go. With practice you will be able to control your return better.
I find it interesting that you were visiting your mother-in-law and not someone in your own genetic family. Evidently, you and your husband got married for reasons that are even deeper than love. His family's interest in "psychic stuff" will nurture your children in such matters and help them to grow into their own abilities.
You'll never have to be concerned that when your daughter visits them, she'll be discouraged from exploring her own psychic life and power. My parents encouraged me to develop my psychic senses in a time when it wasn't nice to even discuss such things in public. Heck, it's STILL not considered a great topic at the dinner table in some families!
Your kids will get to talk about it ALL and ask questions and read and study. This is going to give them such an edge in life! Talk with your husband about how you want to present this to your kiddos, so that you are united in your approach and ready to tell them their experiences are all natural and okay.
A word or two of warning: Geminis often have difficulty staying grounded in REAL LIFE. Don't get so strung out on your ASTRAL life that you neglect what you're doing here on Earth.
You are at the beginning of a long journey to learn where your power really lies. Try to be patient with this process and take your time.