My sister committed suicide, and someone told me that because of this, she must be an earthbound spirit stuck on the astral plane. Is this true? I know that suicide has traditionally been viewed as a big sin. Do you believe this reflects some higher spiritual truth? I'm very worried about her, and would love your advice on how to contact her and make sure she is okay.
- Jan
Dreamchaser:
This is a really touchy subject for me because my birth family sister killed herself, and I have seen the devastation this wrought on the rest of the family.
I have stated many times in this column that King James mistranslated or altered the Christian Bible so that he could control the population. I think he was the one who decided to make suicide a "mortal sin."
I also believe that big questions like this do not have cut and dried answers. Issues this complex are never black and white, so I think it's wise to consider each case individually.
For example, let's think about soldiers from the Civil War. When soldiers on the front line were moving forward into hand-to-hand combat, they could probably assume that their lives were going to end. Japanese kamikazi pilots from World War II knew when they stepped into their cockpits that they were going to their deaths. Are these not forms of suicide?
What about the Jews that moved up to Masada and killed themselves so that the Romans could not take them alive? That was considered a brave and honorable thing to do. Hari Kari is another form of suicide that is considered an honorable death.
Not every soul that commits suicide is punished. I also do not believe that every soul that commits suicide is stuck in the lower astral plane, or becomes earthbound.
I do believe that in most cases, that soul is taken to a "classroom" type setting, and looks at what happened in the life that they chose to leave. I have also heard from Spirit that the souls of those who commit suicide reincarnate rather rapidly, and are put right back into another life that has the same challenges as the life that they tried to leave behind.
I believe that suicides' paths after death depend on their intentions in taking their own lives. I also think that a soul's journey and lessons are sometimes too complex for our human minds to comprehend, and I feel that this is one of those cases.
No one really knows why my sister killed herself. No one who knew her can figure it out. I feel that she just got tired of the constant struggle that her life had become. It was selfish and thoughtless for her to take her own life, of course, but it was HER decision at the time.
I do not feel her soul will be held in some awful place because of that decision. I do not feel that YOUR sister's soul will be punished as a result of her decision.
I expect that her soul will be forced to look at the decision and why she chose it. I also think that she is going to have to come back and do it again and again and again until she gets that part of her soul's lessons right.
I wish you peace with this horrible situation.
*****
Astrea:
I'm so sorry for your loss. Nothing feels worse than losing someone you love in this way.
Though some suicides become earthbound, most go on to Heaven and wait to be born again. Your sister certainly is NOT bound to this earth in any way, though she may choose to return to "check" on you and the rest of your family from time to time.
Over the years I've learned that no matter what earthly experience led suicides to take their own lives, it all instantly falls away from them when they die. They then travel on into the Light for a period of rest and reflection, just like everyone else.
It IS a bit harder for suicides to communicate with us at first, but in time, she'll come to you in dreams and talk to you again. Right now, it's HER guilt over taking her own life that prevents her from being with you. That takes time to heal, and is the worst of what she'll go through in the afterlife as a result of committing suicide.
The people left behind suffer from wondering much more than people who take their own lives. Suicide is a dreadful and horrible decision to make, and it's selfish when it is designed to punish others. "They'll be sorry when I'm dead" is SO TRUE. We're all SO SORRY that we couldn't make that person's life worth living.
The person dying isn't the true victim of suicide because she'll be fine. It's the rest of us who have to deal with that selfish act for the rest of our lives.
Obviously, people who take their own lives are caught up in profound suffering. While it's the ultimate arrogant act, and God certainly doesn't like it, God forgives it IMMEDIATELY. God is so all-forgiving and compassionate that even throwing their life away will not bar a person from Heaven.
Old superstitions still affect us subconsciously, and of course religions that seek to control us have many convinced that if we take our own lives, we'll be "out of the sight of God."
Perhaps that's true for a little while. I'm sure that like everyone else, your sister had a divine process to complete when she died. Then she went into Heaven - or whatever she perceived to be heaven when she was alive. For her, I'm sure it's very peaceful there, as she seems to have been very tired here.
I know you miss her, but you can still talk to her whenever you want. She hears you and she'll help you. It seems to have been a bit easier for her than some of the other suicides I've spoken with over the years. Please know that in saying that, I am not trying to make light of her choice or your suffering.
Let's face it: she was miserable here. She had family and friends on the other side, and they are helping her see herself clearly so she can join the light. She will get there for sure, but in the mean time, you can offer her your healing prayers.
Astrea:
Many times in life we hear, "You will always have what you NEED, but not necessarily what you WANT." Your spirit must have needed to experience the feeling of leaving your human body, and the suggestion in the next chapter of Sylvia Brown's book was all it took to get you there.
Even though you hadn't read it yet, your SOUL recognized the title of that chapter as something it had been seeking, and your soul, knowing that you had that reference to read after your experience, got with it and out you went!
While I don't usually recommend her books, Sylvia Brown has a wide reaching and powerful effect on lots of people. A Gemini like you would be able to relate easily to her writing and put it to good use. Synchronicity - you gotta love it!
I like your description of "getting caught." That's exactly what it feels like, isn't it? One minute you're free and hovering above the room, and the next minute, ZAP! back down into your corporeal form you go!
As a little kid, I loved that "feeling of return." With practice, most of the time we can control that event, but sometimes, when our physical ears hear a distracting noise or something else occurs to knock us back into reality, back we go. With practice you will be able to control your return better.
I find it interesting that you were visiting your mother-in-law and not someone in your own genetic family. Evidently, you and your husband got married for reasons that are even deeper than love. His family's interest in "psychic stuff" will nurture your children in such matters and help them to grow into their own abilities.
You'll never have to be concerned that when your daughter visits them, she'll be discouraged from exploring her own psychic life and power. My parents encouraged me to develop my psychic senses in a time when it wasn't nice to even discuss such things in public. Heck, it's STILL not considered a great topic at the dinner table in some families!
Your kids will get to talk about it ALL and ask questions and read and study. This is going to give them such an edge in life! Talk with your husband about how you want to present this to your kiddos, so that you are united in your approach and ready to tell them their experiences are all natural and okay.
A word or two of warning: Geminis often have difficulty staying grounded in REAL LIFE. Don't get so strung out on your ASTRAL life that you neglect what you're doing here on Earth.
You are at the beginning of a long journey to learn where your power really lies. Try to be patient with this process and take your time.