I have never been a very happy person, but lately things are getting much worse. I am often overcome by feelings of rage, am constantly irritable, and have been growing more and more depressed. My boyfriend says that when I get angry, my voice and face change so that it's like I'm not even the same person. The weirdest part is that I usually don't remember what I said and did when in a rage. I'm starting to feel like a puppet, like some outside force is controlling my emotions. I experimented with a Ouiji board for a while as a teenager and am wondering if that is coming back to haunt me now. Do you think I am possessed?
You state that you have never been a happy person and that when you were a teenager, you experimented with a Ouija board. Since Ouija boards often open people up to attachment by negative entities, if you look back, you may discover that your unhappiness began around the time you were experimenting with spirit communication in this way.
Ouija boards were very popular when I was a teenager; I experimented with them myself. The results were not positive, and I've heard many similar stories from others. Many years later, a friend sent me a Ouija board she had made. When I attempted to use it, I immediately ran into a very malevolent, angry spirit.
It's highly likely that some type of entity attached itself to you when you experimented with the Ouija. These spirits can lie in wait for years before showing themselves. Now that you are aware that this may be the case, there are a number of things you can do to rid yourself of unwanted entities.
First I recommend contacting a psychic who can identify if you do indeed have a discarnate spirit attached to you. Once you know what you're dealing with, you can start the process of setting yourself free. There are certain things that will anger this spirit, so as you move forward, your symptoms may get worse before they get better. I also recommend writing down when and in what circumstances you are overcome with rage. Once you do, you may notice a pattern and realize what triggers these bouts.
There is a clove bath ritual you can perform to cleanse your spirit and dispel any negative energy that surrounds you. Take a quarter cup of whole cloves and add them to four cups of water in a saucepan. Bring the water to a boil and simmer for one hour, adding water as the levels decrease. Strain the cloves and save the water, then add it to a bath. Soak in this bath for 20 minutes, immersing yourself completely three times for three seconds each.
You can also sage your body and surroundings. If the spirit moves away from you, it may still remain in your home, so smudging your house with sage will ensure that it leaves both your body and the premises.
If this doesn't improve the situation, you'll want to call upon a psychic or exorcist to perform a ritual to clear this spirit out. Once that has been done, you will feel lighter, happier and more balanced. Good luck to you!
The first thing to keep in mind is that like attracts like in the Universe. If you are an unhappy person, you will tend to attract unhappy spirits and experiences. If you are an angry person who lacks self-control and frequently goes into rages, you will attract angry, destructive spirits. The good news is that if you cultivate higher qualities such as kindness, patience, peace and happiness, then you will begin to attract spirits of a helpful, benevolent nature.
With this in mind, hopefully you can see that it is never wise to explore psychic territory unless your mind and heart are full of positive thoughts and feelings and you know how to consciously create what you want in your life. This is why so many people who experiment with things like Ouiji boards end up suffering for it. When approached recklessly, it's like wandering off into the African bush to see what you can find: you may encounter truly dangerous creatures and have no idea what to do in order to protect yourself.
From what you describe, it does indeed sound like you are being influenced by a dark spirit. Please don't be alarmed: this is far more common than most people realize, for even when they are not technically
possessed, whenever someone succumbs to their lower nature by acting against their conscience, failing to control their temper, or wallowing in negative emotions, they naturally begin to attract dark metaphysical influences.
To become invulnerable to influence by dark entities, you will have to develop self-control and learn how to purify your mind and heart and develop your higher nature. Based on what you wrote about not remembering your own actions sometimes, I strongly recommend you find a spiritual professional who can help you with the process of breaking free from dark influences and cultivating a higher level of experience.
The first thing to do is make an appointment with a spiritual healer who is familiar with spirit attachment such as a shaman or hypnotherapist. Next, whenever you have a dark thought or feeling, stop and reach for a higher thought. Changing your habits of thought won't be easy, but it is powerful and essential to moving forward on your spiritual path. In fact, you might view this dramatic experience as a wake-up call that it's time for you to start to take conscious control of your inner world.
Many times in life we hear, "You will always have what you NEED, but not necessarily what you WANT." Your spirit must have needed to experience the feeling of leaving your human body, and the suggestion in the next chapter of Sylvia Brown's book was all it took to get you there.
Even though you hadn't read it yet, your SOUL recognized the title of that chapter as something it had been seeking, and your soul, knowing that you had that reference to read after your experience, got with it and out you went!
While I don't usually recommend her books, Sylvia Brown has a wide reaching and powerful effect on lots of people. A Gemini like you would be able to relate easily to her writing and put it to good use. Synchronicity - you gotta love it!
I like your description of "getting caught." That's exactly what it feels like, isn't it? One minute you're free and hovering above the room, and the next minute, ZAP! back down into your corporeal form you go!
As a little kid, I loved that "feeling of return." With practice, most of the time we can control that event, but sometimes, when our physical ears hear a distracting noise or something else occurs to knock us back into reality, back we go. With practice you will be able to control your return better.
I find it interesting that you were visiting your mother-in-law and not someone in your own genetic family. Evidently, you and your husband got married for reasons that are even deeper than love. His family's interest in "psychic stuff" will nurture your children in such matters and help them to grow into their own abilities.
You'll never have to be concerned that when your daughter visits them, she'll be discouraged from exploring her own psychic life and power. My parents encouraged me to develop my psychic senses in a time when it wasn't nice to even discuss such things in public. Heck, it's STILL not considered a great topic at the dinner table in some families!
Your kids will get to talk about it ALL and ask questions and read and study. This is going to give them such an edge in life! Talk with your husband about how you want to present this to your kiddos, so that you are united in your approach and ready to tell them their experiences are all natural and okay.
A word or two of warning: Geminis often have difficulty staying grounded in REAL LIFE. Don't get so strung out on your ASTRAL life that you neglect what you're doing here on Earth.
You are at the beginning of a long journey to learn where your power really lies. Try to be patient with this process and take your time.