My son is 15, and lately I've noticed some disturbing changes in him. Some months ago he became withdrawn, sullen, short-tempered and mean-spirited. He stays in his room all the time, and when he does come out, he lashes out at anyone in his path. Around the same time, he started listening to really angry hard rock music. I'm wondering if the music is making him act this way, or if the music is just another symptom of his angst. I know that just overhearing this music is disturbing to me, so I wonder what hours after hours of listening to it is doing to his soul. I worry about what kind of energies this music is attracting to him and to our house. Do I need to put my foot down about this? What do you think?
- Roxie
Astrea:
Your son is not consciously trying to freak you out, but he IS trying to freak you out. He wants your complete attention but he can't tell you that because that would make him feel stupid. Though they're not supposed to at his age, all boys do want Mama, and all teens need structure.
At least his behavior is consistently awful for now. When hormones go crazy, most parents do too. My son went through a typical grungy phase that lasted from about 14 to 16. I always knew he and his friends were home and hiding out upstairs because I could smell them. If I remember correctly, their favorite lyrics went something like Kill your parents, kill your parents, kill your parents while they sleep...
You have to be a diligent mother. Monitor or limit his internet use and be aware of dangerous, self-destructive behavior. Make him bring his friends home with him; it will be worth the cost of extra groceries because even if your kid won't talk to you, his friends will.
Even kids who become wonderful people later in life will do all sorts of negative things to get attention when they're teens. Your teen knows that loud, angry music and sullen behavior makes you worry about him, so he's passive-aggressively expressing his inner turmoil in these ways.
If you told him not to climb the big tree in your yard, he'd probably find a way to build himself a tree house. Teens are known to listen to horrible music - just look at Mozart and the terrible
music he wrote to rebel against tradition. Even Jesus started making trouble as a youngster. Do you think it could have been that ear splitting, awful-sounding nose flute everyone played at celebrations?
Whenever I began to fear my son was a serial killer in the making, I would take him somewhere to eat so we could have a long talk. Take your son out and gently tell him that you are concerned about the music he's listening to making him UNHAPPY. When they realize that we really care, most kids will tell us if something is wrong.
Be prepared for this to continue for a while longer, and understand that the more you complain about it, the more he's going to want to find things to upset you. Fortunately, I seriously doubt this music will affect his soul as much as it may his ears.
Try to be as tolerant as possible. Teens are difficult people to deal with more often than not, but this transition to adulthood is much harder on him than the rest of you. I recommend you buy the other members of the family some ear plugs and learn to watch television with closed captions.
*****
Susyn:
You absolutely must put your foot down about this as well as any internet activity that could be adding to his angry and unsettled mood. The vibrations of this type of music and the attitude they are creating in your son are definitely connected.
Although we are often unaware of it, any noise pollution in our surroundings will have an immediate affect on our feelings, attitudes and general demeanor. Just as we might listen to soft, calming music during meditation or to de-stress, the kind of music you describe will have the opposite affect of unsettling, upsetting and agitating us no matter what age we are.
I'm not decrying all music of this genre, but I wouldn't ignore the immediate effects you're witnessing it have on your son. Don't forget that the music and movie business have known for years what they are doing to subtly affect their audiences and create certain moods and responses.
When it first came out, I recall the producers of the Exorcist bragging that they had purposefully evoked primal fear via the film's soundtrack. By weaving the sound of swarming bees into the music, they aimed to trigger subliminal fears in the viewers - as if this movie wasn't visually scary enough!
This should tell us that we're wise to ponder how various input may be influencing us on a subconscious level. Even department stores will utilize piped in music and aromas to influence shoppers. The truth is that we are constantly being bombarded by this type of subliminal seduction.
Many business enterprises work hard to create, influence and harm us in secretive, manipulative ways. The harder we try to break free of this type of mind control, the harder businesses work to find new and more powerful ways to manipulate us. Of course, they already know that if they can get into the minds of our children, they will have lots of power (and profits) for many years to come.
I know it's difficult with teenagers, for you want to support their independence and their right to make their own decisions. In this case, however, your son is young and easily influenced, so you'll have to stand your ground.
He may throw a major fit about you cutting him off from his music, and he may even try to defy you by listening to it when he's out from under your watchful eye, but in the long run, taking a stand on his behalf is something he will thank you for later.
A parent's job is harder today than ever before, but that's what makes it so important that you take a stand on his behalf and look out for his best interests.
Astrea:
Many times in life we hear, "You will always have what you NEED, but not necessarily what you WANT." Your spirit must have needed to experience the feeling of leaving your human body, and the suggestion in the next chapter of Sylvia Brown's book was all it took to get you there.
Even though you hadn't read it yet, your SOUL recognized the title of that chapter as something it had been seeking, and your soul, knowing that you had that reference to read after your experience, got with it and out you went!
While I don't usually recommend her books, Sylvia Brown has a wide reaching and powerful effect on lots of people. A Gemini like you would be able to relate easily to her writing and put it to good use. Synchronicity - you gotta love it!
I like your description of "getting caught." That's exactly what it feels like, isn't it? One minute you're free and hovering above the room, and the next minute, ZAP! back down into your corporeal form you go!
As a little kid, I loved that "feeling of return." With practice, most of the time we can control that event, but sometimes, when our physical ears hear a distracting noise or something else occurs to knock us back into reality, back we go. With practice you will be able to control your return better.
I find it interesting that you were visiting your mother-in-law and not someone in your own genetic family. Evidently, you and your husband got married for reasons that are even deeper than love. His family's interest in "psychic stuff" will nurture your children in such matters and help them to grow into their own abilities.
You'll never have to be concerned that when your daughter visits them, she'll be discouraged from exploring her own psychic life and power. My parents encouraged me to develop my psychic senses in a time when it wasn't nice to even discuss such things in public. Heck, it's STILL not considered a great topic at the dinner table in some families!
Your kids will get to talk about it ALL and ask questions and read and study. This is going to give them such an edge in life! Talk with your husband about how you want to present this to your kiddos, so that you are united in your approach and ready to tell them their experiences are all natural and okay.
A word or two of warning: Geminis often have difficulty staying grounded in REAL LIFE. Don't get so strung out on your ASTRAL life that you neglect what you're doing here on Earth.
You are at the beginning of a long journey to learn where your power really lies. Try to be patient with this process and take your time.